


Waiting For Forever

by fallingforyoureyes



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe, F/M, Inspired by a Movie, M/M, Minor Character Death, Minor Violence, based off a movie, im horrible at this, so um idk what to tag
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-04-12
Updated: 2013-11-29
Packaged: 2017-12-08 06:08:13
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 10
Words: 27,130
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/757973
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/fallingforyoureyes/pseuds/fallingforyoureyes
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Harry is a contentedly jobless wanderer who decides to focus his energies on reconnecting with the boy he loved as a child, who is now a famous actor.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Prologue

**Author's Note:**

> This will be a chaptered fic that I just started. It is based off of the movie by the same title. I just adore the movie so much and I adore Larry so much, so a combination of these two are fantastic. Enjoy!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Just a really short prologue for the story.

                If you asked Harry, he would say there was a moment in everybody’s life when they are helpless, just helpless with hope and trust. And then something happens, something too big to understand and then everything changes forever. If you asked Harry, he would say that everyone starts out with goodness so pure and clear that you don’t even know it’s there, because that’s the way it is when you don’t know anything. And then the news begins to arrive and everything falls apart completely like a train going off the rails.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Harry meets Zayn and Liam and starts to tell the story about his past with Louis.
> 
> Louis heads back home to Doncaster and you learn a little bit about him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I think the other chapters might end up being longer than this, so sorry if this is short! I’m trying to do it so you get both Harry and Louis’ perspective in each chapter. I proofread it, but I’m always tired so if there are any mistakes, sorry. Enjoy!

                The sun is pelting down onto Harry’s back when he began hitchhiking in the morning. He’s grateful for the change from the usual cloudy skies or rain, but it’s bright and warm even with the slightly cool air and he’s not used to it. It wouldn’t be so bad if he didn’t have as many layers on, but these were the only clothes he had. Even if he took off some of them, he would be left carrying the clothing articles but he already had to carry his heavy bag that was full so he didn’t want to carry anything more. He’s wearing what he is always wearing. He’s wearing blue plaid pajama pants. He has the sleeves rolled up and tucked back on the matching pajama shirt with a plain white t-shirt underneath it all. To pull the outfit together, he’s wearing, as always, white Converse and a black hat that he thinks is a fedora but he isn’t for sure. He never knew much about hats anyways.

  
                The clothes always gave Harry many stares from strangers, but he didn’t care. They were convenient and comfortable, and sometimes, they got him the attention that he needed.

  
                Harry is lost in his thoughts when a car finally pulls up to a stop next to him. He looks over and smiles in at the people in the front. There’s two young males in the car and he thinks they look pretty friendly. Harry opened the car door, gently easing in his bag into the backseat first before crawling in himself. He shut the car door behind him before sitting up straight and smiling slightly. Before he even had a chance to thank the men for picking him up, the two are already bickering.

  
                “Zayn, I told you to put away that cigarette,” one of the men said. From what Harry could see of him, he had short brown hair and a deep voice. “They’re nasty. I hate them. I told you not to smoke them anymore.”

  
                “I’m not smoking it, Liam,” the other man argued back, sounding as if it should be obvious. This man had raven hair that was styled up into a quiff. “I’m just holding it. Nothing wrong with that.” Harry leaned over some and noticed the unlit cigarette being held between Zayn’s fingers while he held onto the steering wheel.

  
                “I still don’t like it,” Liam replied. “I don’t like cigarettes. Why do you think I got you to try and quit smoking?”

  
                “I just want one more, and you never let me had one even though it was my birthday, Liam, let me at least hold the bloody thing,” he shot back.

  
                The car was silent for a few minutes after that and Harry felt a bit awkward. He felt like he needed to say something, but the pair hadn’t even acknowledged him yet. “It’s your birthday?” he finally asked. “Happy birthday.”

  
                “It was actually yesterday, but thank you,” Zayn replied.

  
                “No, thank you, for picking me up,” Harry politely responded.

  
                “You’re welcome.”

  
                Harry opened his mouth, about to say something, when Liam started talking to him first. “He only picked you up to annoy me,” he said.

  
                “No,” Zayn immediately countered, grinning some. “I’m holding the cigarette to annoy you. I picked up the boy because he looked like he needed some help.”

  
                Liam scoffed some. “Give me that thing,” he said before reaching over and ripping the cigarette out from between Zayn’s fingers. He rolled down the window and threw it out. “Nasty,” he commented under his breath before turning around to face Harry. “I’m Liam. This is Zayn,” he said while pointing over to the man who was driving.

  
                Harry gave a gentle smile and nodded some. “I’m Harry,” he replied.

  
                “You better hold on tight, Harry,” Zayn replied. “Liam and I have only been married for a few years but we already bicker like an old couple.” He paused before asking, “Are you married?”

  
                Harry stayed silent while he thought about an answer. “Not officially,” he replied. “But I’ll tell you the truth, I might as well be.”

  
                Zayn nodded a bit. “So you have a girlfriend then?” he asked.

  
                Harry shook his head. “It’s kind of hard to have a girlfriend when the person is a boy,” he said, chuckling some.

  
                Zayn looked over at Liam and smiled a bit before looking back to the road. “So you a boyfriend then?” he asked.

  
                “I certainly do,” Harry replied back, smiling even wider. “That’s why I’m going back to Doncaster, going back to the place where we both were born. His parents still live there.” He paused for a moment before saying, “His name is Louis.”

  
                “Louis,” Zayn repeated.

  
                “Louis!” Harry exclaimed back happily which only got Liam and Zayn to start laughing.

  
                “So how long have you and Louis been together?” Zayn asked.

  
                “Oh well,” Harry started, hesitating a moment. His eyebrows furrowed together in confused. “What do you exactly mean by together?”

  
                “You know…together,” Zayn answered. “A couple.”

  
                “I’d, well…” Harry started slowly again. “I guess I’d have to say forever.” Zayn stayed silent, slightly confused by the answer. When Zayn never responded, Harry continued, “Well, we went to school together until I was ten, that’s probably more of what you mean. And then I, um,…move away.”

  
                Zayn stayed quiet again for a while, letting it all sink it. “So you and Louis live together now in Doncaster?” he asked.

  
                Liam sighed loudly. “Zayn, stop asking so many personal questions,” he told his husband. “Harry, you don’t have to share this with us.”

  
                “Oh, I don’t mind!” Harry replied cheerfully, happy that anyone was caring enough to ask. He loved to talk to people about Louis when he got the chance. Louis was so wonderful. “No,” he answered Zayn’s question. “He’s mostly in London. His dad is sick, or so I hear, so he’s—“

  
                “You hear?” Zayn interrupted.

  
                “Pardon?” Harry replied.  
  


                “You hear his dad is sick?” Zayn asked back. “How did you hear?”

  
                “No, you see, my best friend Niall told me—“ Harry started.

  
                “No, no, no,” Zayn replied back quickly. “Wait just a moment now.”

  
                “Zayn,” Liam warned quietly from his spot in the passenger seat. “Maybe it’s none of your business.”

  
                “Liam!” Zayn exclaimed back.

  
                “No, you leave that boy alone,” Liam immediately replied.

  
                “Oh hush up,” Zayn retorted.

  
                A silence filled the car. Liam turned around some and looked at Harry, giving him an apologetic smile before facing forward again, letting out a heavy sigh. Zayn frowned as he looked over at Liam. He had to look back to the road but Zayn reached across and placed a hand on Liam’s thigh, squeezing it some. “Stop that,” Liam replied and pushed his hand away. Zayn just started to laugh some more but he knew that Liam wasn’t really mad at him when he started to laugh too. Harry couldn’t help but join in the laughter too.

•

                Louis made his way over to baggage claim after getting off of the plane. As soon as he had gotten word that his dad was really sick, he packed up everything and left as soon as possible, deciding to take a flight out to Doncaster instead of driving just because it was a much faster trip. Once he got his luggage, he made his way outside of the airport and over to one of the cab drivers that was waiting there for a customer. “Hi,” Louis greeted him quietly. “Could you take me to the Belmont?” he asked.

  
                The cab driver just nodded and took Louis’ suitcase from him, walking around back to put it in the trunk while Louis got into the back seat. Once the driver was back in and they were on their way, Louis let himself fully relax. He leaned his head against the window and closed his eyes, sighing softly.

  
                Louis couldn’t help but think of everything that had gone wrong recently, the biggest concern with his father though. He knew he probably should have gone straight home to visit his mum and dad, but he needed a night to himself. A night completely alone because he was never alone anymore. He was always with a rep or some PR person, or with friends. Even when he was at his own flat in London, he still felt like he was being constantly watched. He just wanted to be alone and he needed one night to process everything. He needed time to process that his dad was sick, and he needed time to process his mistake and his other problems. So that was why he was staying at a hotel tonight instead of going back home.

  
                “We’re here,” the cab driver said as he pulled up outside of the hotel.

  
                Louis sighed once more and opened his eyes, looking at the hotel before getting out. The driver got out and got his suitcase for him again before heading back around and handing it to Louis who gave him a friendly smile in return. “I don’t mean to intrude or whatever,” the driver said. “But aren’t you that one actor, from that one show? You look just like him. My wife watches it all the time.”

  
                Louis’ smile immediately dropped. He hated being recognized. He thought being an actor was what he always wanted to do. It never brought the happiness that he thought it would though. He nodded. “I am,” he answered, opening his wallet and pulling out some money and handing it over to the driver. “Here’s for the fare and there’s some extra in there for you to keep too.” He picked up his suitcase and headed in.

  
                Once he was settled into a room, Louis just sat on the bed and listened to the silence. He tried to clear his thoughts but it wasn’t working, so he got up and took a hot shower instead, letting the steam swarm him and fill his mind. That only worked so long before the water started to get cold, so he hurriedly washed and got out, switching into his pajamas and lying down in bed. He just laid there and stared up at the ceiling for a while before deciding he should probably call home, let them at least know he got in safe. Louis sat up and found his cell phone and called the number for his house.

  
                After a few rings, the phone was answered. “Hello?” his mum’s voice came onto the line.

  
                “Hi Mum,” Louis replied back, sitting up against the headboard.

  
                “Louis!” Jay exclaimed. “I’ve been so worried for you. Where are you?”

  
                Louis hesitated for a second. “I missed my flight, came in late,” he lied. “I didn’t know you would still be up Mum, so I was just going to call and leave a voicemail. I didn’t want to come in this late at night to the house and wake you and dad up, so I got a hotel instead.”

  
                “Oh, goodness,” she replied. “I’m just happy you’re alright. Is James with you?”

  
                Louis closed his eyes shut tight and let out a shaky breath. “No,” he replied softly. “He couldn’t make it.”

  
                “Oh, I’m so disappointed,” his mother replied.

  
                Louis nodded, swallowing thickly. “Me too,” he lied. “I’m okay though.”

  
                There was an awkward silence between them for a few before Jay said, “We watched the show last week,” she started. “You were so good on it. The show is really great. I don’t understand why it got canceled.” Louis just bit his lip, unsure of what to reply. He hated talking about the show. He thought it was a horrible show and he only was on it for the money, but now that was falling apart too like everything else in his life. “Alright, well,” his mother said. “How are you? You sound sad.”

  
                “Oh no, I’m great,” Louis replied back as cheerfully as he could. “I’m great. Just a little tired.” He faked a yawn. “I’m excited to see you and dad again, but I guess I’ll see you tomorrow then?”

  
                “Alright,” Jay replied. “Bye, love you.”

  
                “Love you too Mum. Bye,” Louis said before hanging up. His fake smile went away as he sat his phone down onto the nightstand and laid down fully into bed and turned off the lamp.

  
                It took a little while with his wandering mind, but he eventually fell asleep.


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Harry tells a story about his childhood with Louis.
> 
> A suspicious unknown person calls for Louis.
> 
> Louis finally goes back home to see his dad.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well this chapter came out shorter than I planned it to, so sorry for that. Sorry for it sucking too. Liam is a little blubbering mess in this, aw cutie. Also, in this, I have Mark as Louis’ dad and they have a good relationship. I just thought that should be noted. So yeah…uhh, I don’t know what else to say. Enjoy and hopefully the next chapter will be more interesting :)

               “Zayn.”

                It’s Liam that said his name.

                They had drove over night, not stopping for a hotel, so Liam and Zayn had switched positions in the car so Zayn could get some rest. He had easily fallen asleep. Harry tried his best not to fall asleep because he didn’t want to leave Liam alone, but he couldn’t, eventually falling asleep. In the morning when he woke up early, Liam was still driving and Zayn was still sleeping, so naturally Harry did what he did best: entertained. He entertained Liam with a story.

                “Zayn,” Liam said again, this time louder. He sniffled slightly. Harry couldn’t believe he was actually crying.

                “What?” Zayn asked back, voice slightly grumpy from being woken up. He opened his eyes and looked over to his husband, sighing softly when he realized he was crying. “What is it?”

                “Zayn, you have to hear this love story,” he replied. “Harry, tell Zayn the story.”

                Harry couldn’t help it as a grin spread across his face but then his face quickly contorted into a mixture of confusion and surprise. “Really?” he asked in disbelief. “You really want to hear that again?”

                “Mmhm,” Liam hummed back, barely getting that response out as he was crying even more. “Tell him.”

                “Tell me what?” Zayn asked, sounding confused but worried as well.

                Liam looked over to Zayn, tears still streaming down his face. “You’re not going to believe this Zayn,” he told him. “Tell him, Harry.”

                “So, we were in year five,” Harry finally started as Liam looks back to the road to see where he was driving. “Me and Louis were always together. His house and mine, they seemed pretty far away from each other at the time, but really there was just a park between them. When we weren’t in school, we spent every free hour we got together in that park. But it’s funny; talking…I don’t remember talking. I don’t remember leading or following. It was like we were inside of something bigger that moved us around and took care of us so we didn’t have to worry about anything but flying on the swing or running free.”

                There was a long pause where Harry took a few deep breaths, but after a little bit, he was finally able to continue the story. “Anyway, we were in class one day. As usual, I was showing off for Louis, that’s what I always did. I always showed off. I needed Louis to see me, to laugh, to be happy with me. I needed Louis to be happy. But then the teacher told us to be quiet and pay attention to the news. So we all did, and on the television was breaking news, a story about a bad train accident that had happened. After school got out, Louis took me back to the main road to wait for my mum and dad, and we just sat there on the rock, looking over at the bend where you could hear the cars before you could see them. Every time I would hear a car, I would think ‘Oh, yeah, here come’s mum and dad. It’s alright’ but their car would never come. After a while, we went back to my house. There had been a large crowd that already accumulated inside and I was confused because I still had the hope that my parents would show up, but sister felt differently. I could just tell by the expression on her face that she thought my parents were gone. And nobody would come out and say what my sister Gemma thought, that Mum and Dad were in that train accident.”

                There was another long pause and silence had taken over the car. “Louis….Louis took me out front and we sat on the porch,” Harry started back up. “And I can remember how he wrapped his arm around my shoulders and held me close and just comforted me even though I was still hoping that my parents would be coming home. He leaned over and whispered something into my ear though, and it made me feel a bit better, but the next morning I got up and there was no car outside. And I knew…I knew Mum was never going to tuck me in again. I knew me and my sister were going to have to move to Holmes Chapel to live with my aunt and uncle. And I…I had to say goodbye to Louis.”

                Harry stopped speaking after that because it was emotional for him. Having to say goodbye to Louis had been on the list of hardest things he’s had to do. Even though he was just a kid, it still hurt a lot. He had loved Louis then, and he still did. Harry just sat there and stared ahead in the car, chewing on his bottom lip. Liam had started to cry harder again and Zayn let out a soft sigh. “Liam,” he said gently. “Liam, pull over. Let me drive, babe.”

                Liam completely ignored Zayn though and when he started speaking, it was directed towards Harry. “Would it be wrong for me to ask what it was that he whispered to you?”

                “Not at all,” Harry replied, taking a deep breath. “What he whispered was: ‘They will always be there. You will always be loved.’” He broke into a wide smile, his mood almost changing completely. “Can you believe that from a ten year old?” He let out a breathy chuckle. “And get this….he was right.”

                “Oh,” Liam whimpered out, starting to cry even harder.

                “Liam,” Zayn said a bit louder. “Liam, pull over. I mean it babe, pull over. You’re swerving all over the road!”

                “Okay, okay,” Liam shakily replied, doing just as his husband asked him to do. He pulled off to the side of the road and just sat in the driver’s seat for a moment before getting out. He headed around to the passenger side. When Zayn got out, he wrapped his arms around Liam and pulled him in close, holding him tightly. He pulled back and pressed a soft kiss to Liam’s lips and wiped away some tears before heading over and getting in the driver’s side.

 




 

               The phone started ringing in the Tomlinson household, startling Jay from her spot next to her husband in their bedroom. She quickly got up and answered the call. “Hello?”

               “Yes, hello,” the voice replied back. “Is Louis there?”

               “No, I’m sorry, he’s not,” Jay replied. “But he should be here soon though. May I ask who is calling?”

               The man on the other end of the line started to take deep, slightly panicked breaths and he just stayed completely silent, the memories flashing through his mind and making him even panicked. “Who is this?” Jay asked again. He couldn’t respond though, so he hung up the call before he could freak out even more.

               Jay pulled back and looked at the phone with a confused expression before hanging up as well, shrugging it off. She made her way downstairs to start making some tea and that was when she saw the cab pull up out front. She quickly ran over to the door and opened it, seeing Louis getting out and paying the driver. Louis grabbed his luggage and turned, smiling at his mum while he started to walk up the drive to her. “Hi mum,” he said when he finally reached her.

               “Oh, my baby,” Jay replied, smiling widely as she pulled him in for a hug. “I missed you so much.” He pulled back and looked over her son. “Look at you.  Oh my god, you look so wonderful.”

               Louis forced a smile onto his face and raised an eyebrow at his mother. “Really?” he asked back.

               “Oh yes,” she replied, looking into his eyes. “And your eyes, so clear.”

               “Are they?” He asked back, not really knowing what else to say. His mother was always like this though, always thinking he was so perfect even though he wasn’t.

               “Yeah, honey, they really are,” she replied back. “You look so….” She paused for a moment, trying to think of a good word. “Happy.”

               Louis’ expression quickly changed to confusion because he wasn’t even sure how it was possible that he looked remotely happy. His eyebrows furrowed together and he took a shaky breath. “I do?” he asked back, his voice soft and weak. “You do too,” he quickly added in, hoping to get the attention off of himself. “You do too.”

               Jay smiled and pulled Louis in for another hug. “I’ve missed you so much,” she softly said again. “Your father is okay, you’ll see.” She pulled back and gave Louis another smile before starting to head into the house with him. “I’m really sorry James couldn’t come with you.”

               “Oh,” Louis replied back, trying to seem like it was a big deal, but honestly it wasn’t. He just waved his hand some, as if pushing the problem away. “It’s okay.”

               Jay took Louis’ suitcase and shut the door behind them. “Are you hungry?” she asked.

               “Uh, no,” he replied. “I just want to see Dad.

               His mother nodded in understanding. “He wants to see you too,” she said back.

               Louis took a deep breath. “How is he?”

               “Oh, well, you know,” Jay started. “The doctors say all kinds of things. It’s his kidneys; the others say it’s his liver.”

               “Did they say anything about my ears going?” Mark’s voice came from upstairs, sounding sarcastic. “I’m dying. Let’s get this show on the road.”

               “Oh, your father,” Jay replied back, rolling her eyes.

               Louis chuckled some and quickly made his way upstairs and into his parents’ bedroom. “Hi Dad,” he said, making his way over to the bed and leaning over, hugging his father. Mark started to laugh some but his smile dropped as he hugged his son. When Louis pulled away, he gave him a small smile and sat down on the edge of the bed. “Looking good,” he told him. It was a lie though. While his father didn’t look too bad, he definitely did not look healthy. He had lost weight and his skin was paler. He just looked fragile.

               “Yeah,” Mark replied. “Why did you come home?”

               Louis sighed. “I really wanted to,” he answered.

               “Hm, I don’t know why,” Mark replied, his voice low and gravely. “I don’t know why you would want to come home. I don’t see how there’s any lack of entertainment out in the entertainment world.” Louis smiled some but rolled his eyes. “Unless you find dying entertaining,” his father quickly added in.

               “Dad, you’re not dying,” Louis said back, forcing a small laugh as if his father had made some joke. “Stop that.”

               “Yeah, yeah,” Mark replied softly, sighing afterwards. “Whatever. You’re right.”

               “Then why do you say such things?” Louis asked back.

               “Oh, you know, for laughs,” he replied, shrugging some. This was just how Mark was though. He was sarcastic and had a good sense of humor, but it was a special type of humor and most people often didn’t understand why he thought it was funny or why he said the things he did say. Louis had grown to understand and love his sense of humor though, but even so, joking about death wasn’t all that funny to him. “I thought that was your type these days, comedy.”

               The small smile Louis had on his face dropped and he let out a huff of air, because once again, somehow the topic got turned around to be on him. Once again, the attention was on him. Mark just chuckled some. “I should probably go put my things away,” Louis said, getting up from the bed.

               “Yeah, you don’t want to have too much fun all at once,” his father sarcastically replied.

               Louis nodded, giving his father a weak smile before getting up and heading back to where his old bedroom was.  He looked around the walls of his bedroom and he sighed before starting to unpack his suitcase, thinking about how much he missed the old days and how much he missed just being normal.


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Harry makes it back into town and visits his sister Gemma and his friend Niall.
> 
> Louis spends time looking through old photos.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh my god..this is sucking really bad. I am so sorry. If you're reading this and you like it, I love you. Any who, I thought this chapter would come out longer but I guess not. Ugh oh well. It’s going to get interesting soon and there will be more Larry soon so please hold on :) Also, Gemma is kind of bitchy and rude in the story and I just wanted to make it known that I do not think she is like that at all! This is just for a fictional story. Also, I didn’t proof read, so if there are any mistakes, I’m sorry!

               The rest of the car ride went smoothly with Zayn driving. Liam kept up a constant conversation with Harry, mostly about his life and about Louis. Harry loved it because he loved talking about Louis every chance he got. Soon enough though the car pulled to a stop on the side of the road by the bank Harry asked Zayn to drop him off at. Harry opened the car door and grabbed his bag, throwing it over his shoulder. He turned to start walking away when the passenger door opened and Liam quickly got out. “Wait, Harry!” he said. Harry turned around and faced Liam who was holding out a sticky note. “Here’s our address and our phone number,” Liam explained while handing the sticky note over. “Put it somewhere safe,” he said and Harry nodded. “If you won’t lose it, you won’t forget.”

  
               “Forget?” Harry asked. “How could I forget you two? Even if it takes fifty years, I’m inviting you to the wedding.”

  
               “Oh,” Liam breathed in surprise before smiling widely. “Oh.” He smiled happily before pulling Harry in for a hug. “You take care of yourself,” he told him.

  
               “You too,” Harry replied politely while pulling back from the hug. Liam reached out and ruffled Harry’s curls some before getting back into the car.

  
               Harry tossed his hat up and caught it in his other hand before placing it back on his head. He waved goodbye to Liam and Zayn as their car drove off. He turned and headed towards the bank. When he reached the front doors, he didn’t hesitate before opening them and making his way inside. The bank was nice and fancy along with everyone in the building. They all wore nice clothing and business suits, but Harry didn’t feel out of place in his pajama set, not even when he got weird stares from them. Harry stopped walking and looked around the place, smiling happily when he saw her walk out of her office. “Gemma!” he shouted, causing everyone else in the room that already wasn’t looking to stare at Harry. Harry ran through a crowd of people and dropped his bag before wrapping his arms around his sister for a tight hug. “I’ve missed you so much,” he told her. Gemma loosely hugged Harry back but she nervously looked around the room at everyone’s reactions. When Harry pulled back, he smiled at his sister and looked her over, noticing the business suit she wore seemed high dollar. “You look nice,” he commented.

  
               “Yeah,” Gemma replied back. “Look at you…” Her voice trailed off though because she couldn’t find a compliment to give her brother. “Grab your bag.” She turned and started to her office.

  
               Harry quickly grabbed his bag and followed Gemma back to her office. When they were inside, Gemma shut the door and moved to sit at her office chair behind her desk. In front of the desk were two leather arm chairs and Harry tossed his bag which landed on one of the chairs. “Wow, look at this place!” he exclaimed while moving to sit in one of the chairs. “Leather!” he said in excitement while plopping down onto the seat.

  
               Gemma sighed and looked at Harry, not smiling or reciprocating his excitement. “Listen, you have to call. That’s all there is to it,” she told him.

  
               “Call?” Harry asked back, laughing some. “I didn’t even know until like four days ago—“

  
               “So four days ago you call then,” Gemma replied back sternly. “You can’t just come into town without letting me know and come in and start messing around with me at work.”

  
               Harry’s smile dropped from his face for a few seconds but he quickly brought it back, chuckling softly. “C’mon,” he slowly said. “You haven’t seen your little brother in a long time.” He jumped up from his seat and held his arms out. “Give the poor guy a hug,” he teased.

  
               “Harry,” Gemma warned.

  
               Harry frowned and his eyebrows furrowed together some as he sat back down. He immediately looked over to his right and smiled slightly before quietly murmuring, “Gemma doesn’t seem very happy to see me.” To anyone else that would be watching, it looked like Harry was talking to himself but to Harry, he wasn’t talking to himself.

  
               “No, Harry!” Gemma said loudly, making Harry jump and bringing his attention back to his sister. “Don’t. Look at me. You have to stop that! You have to stop that or we’re going to have a very bad time here, alright?” Harry took deep breaths and closed his eyes, nodding breathlessly. He never understood why Gemma couldn’t see them when he did and he didn’t understand why it bothered Gemma so much that Harry talked to them. “So let me guess,” she started back up after a moment of silence. “Louis is back in town.”

  
               Harry nodded. “His dad is sick so he came home,” he confirmed, his voice low and soft.

  
               “So you’re still following him around like a puppy?” Gemma asked. Harry’s eyebrows furrowed together again and he just stared at his sister, blinking and staying silent. Gemma shook her head. “And you still haven’t said one word to him.” Harry opened his mouth to speak and defend himself but Gemma’s phone rang and she answered it. “Please hold,” she said before placing the call on hold. She took a deep breath and stared back to Harry, staying silent for a few moments before saying, “I’m kind of busy around here, Harry.”

  
               “Right,” Harry started, letting out a soft breath as he stood from the chair. “I’m going to go to Niall’s,” he said.

  
               “Go to Niall’s,” Gemma agreed.

  
               Harry reached back and picked up his bag, throwing it over his shoulder again before looking down and smiling at his sister. “Well, it was nice to see you again,” he kindly said.

  
               Gemma just looked up to Harry for a moment before picking up the phone and answering the call from earlier.

  
               Harry sighed and made his way out of the bank and down the road, heading to Niall’s place. He owned a guitar shop and there was an upstairs level to the building where he and his wife lived. He liked Niall because he was nice and understanding unlike his sister would be sometimes. Besides Louis, Gemma and Niall were all he had left. He quickly made it to the shop and he walked in, causing the bell on the door to ring. Niall was sitting on a couch tuning up a guitar when he heard the bell and he looked up, immediately smiling when he saw that it was Harry that walked in. Harry looked around some before he noticed a little boy with blonde hair on the ground playing with some toys. Harry made his way over to him and sat his bag down before sitting next to the boy. He started to play with him. Niall sat the guitar down. “Sierra, baby, get out here!” he shouted loudly.

  
               Sierra came out from the back office and went up to Niall. “What?” she asked.

  
               “It’s Harry,” Niall said, smiling over to where Harry was.

  
               Sierra followed her husband’s look. “Harry!” she shouted in excitement and ran over to him. Harry stood up from his spot on the ground and hugged Sierra. “It’s so good to see you!” She told him.

  
               “Alright, come here!” Niall said. Sierra and Harry started to laugh while Harry pulled back and ran over to Niall, crashing into him and giving him a big hug. “Welcome home, buddy,” Niall told him.

  
               Harry pulled back from the hug, smiling happily and widely. He looked down to the little boy and sat next to him again. “Who’s this little one?”

  
               Sierra and Niall smiled at each other before looking back to the two and Sierra answered, “It’s Henrie. Say hi Henrie!”

  
               Harry reached out and started to tickle Henrie causing him to laugh and giggle loudly.

  
               The bell on the door rang again and they all looked up as two guys walked into the store. Niall got up and went to talk to the customers, taking them back to look at some specific guitars, so Sierra picked up her son and moved to sit on the couch and Harry followed her. Once they were both seated, Henrie crawled into Harry’s lap and Sierra smiled over to him. “So Harry, how are you doing?” she asked.

  
               “I’m good, I’m good,” Harry replied slowly, reaching down to mess with Henrie’s hair. “How are you?”

  
               “I’m good,” she replied back as well.

  
               “I’m going to tell Louis that I love him,” Harry instantly responded back.

  
               Sierra was taken by surprise and she smiled happily. “Niall!” she called out. “Niall, this is fantastic!” She looked back to Harry. “I’m so proud of you.”

  
               Niall had been in the middle of talking to the customers when his wife called out for him. He sighed heavily. “If you could just hold on one second please,” he told the two guys. “That’s my wife calling for me. Just hold one second please.” He made his way over to the couch and stood in front of it, looking down at his wife and Harry and his son. “What? What is it?” he asked.

               “He said he’s going to tell Louis that he loves him,” Sierra replied.

  
               Niall’s expression immediately turned from slightly annoyed from being interrupted to being happy from the news. “Atta boy!” he exclaimed, looking to Harry. “When?”

  
               Harry looked up to Niall and replied a simple, “Soon.”

  
               “How soon?” Niall asked.

  
               “Soon,” Harry repeated.

  
               “Soon, okay,” Niall said. “How soon though?”

  
               Harry hesitated for a moment before he finally answered, “Today or tomorrow.”

  
               “Listen, Harry,” Niall said, moving so he was squatted down in front of the couch and more level with Harry. “I want you to look me in the eyes and I want you to give me your word of honor that today…or tomorrow…you’re going to go to Louis’ house and you’re going to knock on his door and tell him everything and get this over with.”

  
               Harry stayed quiet for a few before he picked up Henrie, who was still sitting in his lap, and turned him around so he could look him. “Henrie,” he started. “I’m going to tell Louis everything. Okay? I’m going to tell him that I love him and that I’ve always loved him. I’m going to tell him that in my dreams, I breathe him in.” He paused for a moment before laying Henrie down in his lap. “That I inhale him and then I feel him in my blood right here,” he said while pointing to Henrie’s chest where his heart would be. “I feel him in the blood in my heart.”

  
               “Heart,” Henrie said back, laughing slightly.

  
               “Yeah, that’s right,” Harry replied, grinning widely. “Heart.”

  
               “Wait a minute,” Niall interrupted. He had been smiling throughout Harry’s speech but when he got to the part about the heart, he was put off a bit. “The blood in your heart? That’s insane.”

  
               “In his blood,” Sierra corrected her husband. “It’s very nice. You know, what’s wrong with you? Let him go on.” Niall opened his mouth to counter that but his wife quickly intercepted, “It’s romantic. Let Harry tell Louis whatever he wants to. We should be encouraging him. This is a good thing.”

  
               Niall sighed and nodded. “You’re right, I’m sorry,” he apologized and looked back to Harry. “So when are you going to do this?” he asked again, grinning.

  
               Harry smiled back and replied, “Today or tomorrow.”

 

•

 

               Louis had woken up the next morning feeling a little bit relaxed. He was only relaxed some though because he knew he didn’t have to go out and try to please anyone. He didn’t have to go out into the public eye and worry about being seen or recognized. It was nice. He took a long shower and helped his mother cook breakfast. He kept his dad company in the morning while his father tried to eat some breakfast in an attempt to keep food down. He was tired and feeling sick afterwards though, so Louis left his room to go nap. He was happy when his mother didn’t want to take time to talk or catch up because Louis honestly just didn’t feel like it. He loved his mother to death but his mum always wanted to know about his life, and right now his life was not good. He couldn’t tell her that and so he would have to lie, but he absolutely hated lying to her.

  
               So while his mother decided to spend her time out in the garden, he decided to spend his time alone in his room. The room he was staying in was his bedroom when he lived at home and it was still decorated as he had it. There were football posters of teams and his football trophies around the room from when he played for a little while when he was younger. He noticed a pile of pictures on his desk though and he never remembered leaving those there. He made his way over and sat in his desk chair and looked at the pile. He figured his mother must have been in here looking through them. Just as Louis was about to start looking through them, his phone started to ring and he jumped. He pulled it out of his pocket and he answered it without even checking to see who it was. He instantly regretted doing that when he realized it was James. “What do you want?” he rudely asked.

  
               “We need to talk, now,” James replied sternly.

  
               “I don’t think so,” Louis harshly replied.

  
               “I don’t think you have a say in this, Louis,” he replied back.

  
               Louis stayed quiet for a few. “We’re not talking right now, it can wait,” he said, his tone more soft. He had been on James’ bad side before and he definitely didn’t want to be there again. “Goodbye, James,” he said before hanging up the call and turning off his phone.

  
               Louis took deep and shaky breaths, staring down at the mess on his desk before he finally picked up the first picture. It was of him and his parents when they had saved up enough money to take a trip to America to spend part of the summer in Florida at the beaches. He looked through more pictures. Him with his football team. His school pictures. Him when he lost his first tooth. Him playing at the park with a little curly haired boy. He looked through all of the pictures and he was surprised how there were a lot of them where he was with the curly haired boy and it suddenly dawned on him that the boy was his best friend when he was younger. He couldn’t help but smile as all the memories of his childhood best friend came back to him, and he also couldn’t help but wonder where he was and what he was doing now.


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Louis has a talk with his mother.
> 
> Harry almost completes his promise he made Niall, and he has dinner with his family.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yay, got this chapter done! This chapter is a little different because it starts off in Louis’ pov instead of Harry’s, but it still has both parts :D Also, just another reminder that Gemma isn’t this rude and I don’t believe she is, it’s just for a fictional story. Also, I didn’t proof read again because I’m too lazy, so if there’s any mistakes, sorry.

                Louis spent the day much like he had spent yesterday. He stayed in his room, looking around at old memories and reminiscing on how his life used to be. He only occasionally left his room to check on his dad or help his mother with something. Today was no different, except that he didn’t even bother to make himself look all that decent. He stayed lounging around in some black sweats and a gray hoodie of his. He wore a beanie because he didn’t even want to bother with his hair. He was just really tired of having to impress people or having to constantly look nice. He was tired of the life he was living.

                Closer to the evening though, there was a knock on his bedroom door as his mother walked in. She gave him a small smile. “Come have tea with me on the front porch, would you?” she asked. “The weather is beautiful. I’d hate to see you locked up in the room all day.”

                Once again, Louis was struck with the feeling to please. That was what he was always doing; it was what he had to do. He just sighed and nodded. “I’ll be down in a few,” he told her. Jay smiled and nodded, leaving Louis’ bedroom and shutting the door behind her.

                Louis laid back down in his bed and stared up at the ceiling for a while before finally finding the energy to get back up. He put on some shoes and made his way downstairs and out onto the front porch. Jay was already sitting in one of the chairs with two mugs sitting on the stand that stood between the two chairs. Louis gave his mother a small smile as he sat down and took his mug, sipping some of the tea. “It’s your favorite,” she told him. “Just how you used to like it.” She sat her own mug down and grabbed a plate full of biscuits, handing it over to Louis. He just smiled politely and took a few, thanking her before taking a bite of one.

                His mother didn’t speak up afterwards and Louis was grateful for the silence. He just turned and looked around, seeing the tree house that was in his backyard. He smiled some and let out a soft sigh. It was like someone opened a floodgate, and all these memories came rushing back into his mind. He could remember building and spending plenty of time up in the tree house. He wondered what it would be like to go up there now, to go up there and play. He wished he could. He wished he could just go back to his childhood and start all over again. “It’s so weird…” Louis started slowly, looking back to his mother.

                “What’s so weird?” Jay asked back.

                “How I was little…and now I’m not so little anymore,” Louis replied. “The tree house…it almost seems like a dream.” He paused, letting out a soft breath. “I remember Dad making it. I was the nail boy and just handed him the tools because the first time I tried to hammer a board, I smashed Dad’s thumb.” He shared a small laugh with his mum before continuing. “But now look at it….look at me. Look at us. I…It’s just so weird.” Jay smiled softly but she stayed quiet as she stared at her son with a slight questioning look. Louis inhaled deeply and let the breath of air out slowly. “Was I a good little boy?” he asked.

                Jay sat up and shook her head some. “Oh, for heaven’s sake, why would you ever ask me that?” she asked, her voice slightly shaky. “You were the most wonderful, clever, bright, happy, happy, happy little boy there ever was…and you haven’t changed a bit.”

                Louis let out a breathy laugh and rolled his eyes again but he stayed quiet again. He grabbed his mug and continued to drink his tea as he looked back out to the tree house. His mother’s answer wasn’t what he was looking for, and it only made him feel worse. He wasn’t this wonderful, clever, bright, happy, happy, happy little boy anymore. He definitely changed, not just a bit but a lot. He wasn’t wonderful and clever, he was horrible and deceitful. He wasn’t bright and happy. He used to be, but he wasn’t anymore. He was dull and boring, upsetting. He was a settler and never strived for the things that used to make him happy. Louis was stuck, just wishing he could have been stuck in a better place though.

_________________________________________

                Harry was sitting and staring. That was all he could do. Except breathe, although he felt like he was barely doing that. Here he was keeping his promise to Niall. He was hidden behind a tree that stood in the front yard of the Tomlinson household. He came with every intention of following through with his plan. He was going to be brave. He was going to knock on the door. He was going to tell Louis everything. Except he wasn’t expecting Louis and his mother to already be sitting on the front porch; it sent Harry off guard and he started to panic, not knowing what to do. His original plans slipped from his mind and all he could do was stand hidden by the tree and stare while taking quick and shallow breaths of air.

                Louis was so beautiful. He was just sitting there and talking to his mother or staring off in space and Harry could only stare in awe as if Louis was up on some pedestal dressed in the finest clothing. He really was in just lounging clothes and he looked tired, but Harry was sure he was still the most beautiful thing he had ever seen on earth. It was weird though, because Harry always stared at Louis from afar and each time it seemed like he grew more beautiful. He found himself just wanting to hold Louis and kiss him and protect him and just love him. The only thing stopping him from doing that was himself.

                Harry mentally argued with himself and tried to build up the courage to just go speak with him, but as he saw Louis and his mother get up and head inside, he knew his chance had been blown. He took shaky breaths as he watched him walk inside and leave. He couldn’t take it anymore and he started to take loud gasps of air, trying to breathe properly and calm down. He turned around and sat on the ground, leaning back against the tree for support.

                Sometime later, a car pulled to a stop in front of Harry and he looked up, seeing Gemma in the driver’s seat. He got up and slowly made his way to the car, leaning over and looking into the open window to his sister. “I still know where to find you,” she said. “Get in. Matt’s making dinner and the kids want to see you.” Harry nodded and got in the passenger seat, shutting the car door. He immediately leaned forward, resting his head on the dashboard, gasping for air still. Gemma looked down at her little brother and shook her head some. “What’s wrong with you?” she asked.

                Harry slowly sat up so he was back against the seat. “I…don’t know,” he replied back between his heavy breaths.

                “You don’t know?” Gemma questioned.

                “Nothing, it’s okay, I’m fine,” Harry breathed out in one quick response.

                Gemma nodded some. “Good,” she said, putting the car into drive and heading off.

                By the time they had reached Gemma’s house, Harry was calmed down and breathing normally. His mind was still racing everywhere though as he constantly thought about Louis. When they were inside, Gemma went to go talk to her husband Matt while Harry went straight to the backyard where he was told the kids were. He went out there and saw his niece and nephew playing together on the swing set. They looked up and smiled. “Uncle Harry!” they shouted in unison, getting off the swings and running towards him. Harry let them tackle him down into the grass and he laughed, reaching up and starting to tickle them both which got them screaming and laughing loudly as they jumped off of him. All three of them stood up and he smiled down at the little kids. “Got any new tricks for us, Uncle Harry?” his nephew, Jack, asked.

                “Well, let’s see…” Harry started, looking around the back yard. “Ah!” He saw three tennis balls sitting by the swings and he ran over and got them before coming back in front of the kids. He started to juggle the tennis balls and when he was able to do it for more than just a few seconds, this earned multiple cheers from the kids.

                “Yay, Uncle Harry!” his niece, Molly, shouted.

                Harry juggled the balls for a good few minutes. He was so focused that he didn’t even realized Gemma’s husband Matt had come up behind him. He was smiling from seeing his children happy and laughing. Eventually Harry stopped and he just let the balls drop back down one by one. Jack and Molly cheered and clapped loudly again.

                “Supper is ready,” Matt said loudly, turning Harry’s attention to him. “C’mon. Go wash up.” Jack and Molly ran back into the house. Matt made his way up to Harry. “How’re you doing Harry?” he asked.

                Harry nodded. “I’m doing well,” he replied, smiling happily. “Thank you for having me for dinner.”

                “You know it’s no problem,” Matt replied.

                They went both headed back inside and into the dining room where Gemma and the kids were already seated at the dining room table. Matt took a seat next to his wife and Harry took the only empty seat that was between Jack and Molly. They kids took turns talking about their days at school and Harry paid attention while he ate.

                “So how are things going Harry?” Matt asked once the children were done. “How’re you getting by?”

                Harry swallowed the bite of the meal he was eating before answering. “Things are alright,” he replied back. “I made a lot of money off of playing the guitar I had, but then it got stolen. Now I have reverted to having to do a lot of acts. I juggle now or do other cool, little tricks. On a good day, I’ll make about twenty five pounds.”

                “Wow!” Matt replied back, sounding surprised and happy. He was always more understanding and supportive of Harry than Gemma was.

                “How much tax are you paying on those twenty five pounds that you’re making?” Gemma asked.

                “C’mon, you’ve got to be kidding,” Matt lowly said to her. “Really, Gemma?”

                “What? I’m just curious,” Gemma replied. “Does he pay taxes on the money he makes? What’s wrong with that?”

                Jack and Molly had grown quiet, understanding their terse tones and knowing that this wasn’t an issue they should get involved in. Harry looked up from his plate and shrugged some. “Should I?” he asked.

                Matt shook his head. “You don’t need to pay any tax, okay?” he replied, looking over at Gemma before looking back to Harry. “Would you like some dessert? Maybe some cake, tea or coffee if you would like.” Harry just smiled and nodded.

                “Well there’s a good solution,” Gemma interjected. “Just don’t worry about the problem, right?”

                Matt sighed. “What problem?” he asked. “What problem? He has no problem.

                “He has no problem?” Gemma asked back in disbelief. “He doesn’t have a home. He doesn’t have a job.”

                “I have a home,” Harry argued back.

                “A room in some flea-bag motel is not a home,” Gemma countered. Harry let out a heavy breath and looked up to his sister. “He doesn’t have any clothes. He doesn’t have a car,” she continued.

                “I had a car,” Harry argued back again, his voice sounding weaker though.

                “You _had_ a car,” Gemma pointed out. “Not anymore.”

                “I hated it,” Harry replied. “Because I always had to…put it somewhere.”

                “Life is tough having to put that car somewhere,” Gemma replied sarcastically.

                There was a tense silence as Harry and Gemma stared each other down. Jack broke the silence by asking, “Aren’t pajamas clothes?”

                “Can I tell you something right now?” Harry asked Jack. “They’re the best clothes. There’s nothing like them.” He pushed his chair out from the table. “Just feel them,” he said, holding out his arms for both his niece and nephew. “They’re very soft,” he said while Molly and Jack reached out to rub the material of his sleeves, murmuring in agreement about how it was really soft. “They’re soft and cheap, and your legs…” Harry started, pushing the chair back more. He quickly jumped up so he was standing on the chair. “Your legs are free!” he said, jumping off the chair and landing on the ground, spinning and jumping and kicking his legs around. The kids started to laugh loudly and Matt couldn’t even help but join in some of the laughter.

                “Kids,” Gemma loudly interrupted, forcing Harry to stop what he was doing and looking to his sister. “Go to your rooms. Go.”

                “Aw, man,” Jack replied back sadly.

                “Go to your rooms. Go play,” Gemma said. “Give us a couple of minutes.”

                Matt’s smile faded from his face as he watched his children get up and slowly make their way inside. Harry just stood in the same spot for a little while before sitting back into the chair he was at before. He sat hunched over some and looked up at his sister as if he was a child that was about to be scolded.

                Gemma stayed silent for a while thought before looking over to her husband. “Remember that television show?” she asked.

                “What show?” Matt slowly asked back.

                “Oh, you remember, it was that new show,” she replied back. “It was that show where you said that guy was Harry.”

                Matt stayed quiet while he thought about it and when he remembered, his face immediately looked guilty. He glanced over at Harry before looking back to Gemma.

                “Anyway, Harry, listen,” Gemma started, looking to her brother now. “There was this news program, okay? And there was this guy who had a cat. All day long, he had to check the refrigerator to make sure he didn’t put the cat inside of it.”

                “Refrigerator?” Harry asked back, laughing some. “The cat in a refrigerator?”

                “That’s right,” Gemma replied back, smiling some, before adding in, “He was nuts.”

                Harry’s smiled started to fade some. “Hey, you know what?” Matt quickly added in. “He wasn’t nuts. He had a disorder.”

                “Yes, a disorder called fucking nuts,” Gemma retorted.

                “Gemma,” Matt warned.

                “Now, when this lunatic closed the door, he had to open it right back up again to make sure the cat wasn’t in there,” she continued anyways. “I mean all day long he was just opening and closing, and opening and closing. And he talked about it…he talked about it very clearly.” She paused for a moment. “Because he felt it was a very reasonable thing to do. Because, who knows…maybe the cat could have gotten in there before he shut the door, right? And so Matt leans over to me and he says, ‘Gemma, that guy…that’s your brother.’” Harry’s eyebrows furrowed together and he glared slightly at his sister. “He said, ‘That’s Harry with Louis’,” Gemma added in. “ ‘He can’t help it’. And you know what, Harry? Matt was right.” There was a silence again and by now Harry’s eyes had watered up. He bit his lip and just stayed silent. Matt was shaking his head bitterly but he didn’t dare look to see Harry’s reaction. “He was right, okay? You talk like following this man around everywhere is something that makes sense, but it doesn’t. It doesn’t make sense. It’s called stalking and it’s against the law, and I want you to stop telling my kids that life is nothing but a bowl of cherries and that everything is just peachy. What life is, what life isn’t, that’s my area, okay? I’ll handle that topic with my kids if that’s alright with you.” Gemma pushed her chair back and got up, quickly heading to a different room.

                Harry’s eyes were full of tears and he just sat and stared at the table, chewing on his bottom lip while he took in his sister’s words. Matt was still sitting at the table and he got up, moving over to the chair next to Harry and sat down next to him. He stayed silent though, unsure of what to say back to Harry. After a little bit, Harry let out a small, watery laugh. “Our mother used to say peachy,” he said, looking to Matt. “I remember she used to say, ‘If this isn’t peachy, then I don’t know what is’.” Matt let out a small breath and Harry smiled slightly. “Gemma says peachy.”

                Matt gave Harry a small smile before letting it drop. “Harry, how did this all start?” he asked seriously.

                “I don’t know,” Harry honestly replied, looking a bit confused as he tried to think of an answer. “For a while, after the train wreck, I would come back here in the summer and I would see Louis. And then, I stopped coming back, but we would write. And that stopped. So, when he went off to college in Manchester, I just went to Manchester.”

                Matt hesitated a moment before asking, “And when you follow Louis around, how often do you actually see him?”

                “It doesn’t matter,” Harry immediately responded. “It’s just…being around where he might be. That’s plenty enough for me.”

                Matt nodded slowly but he stayed quiet. He could see that Harry truly loved Louis and he genuinely felt bad for him and how people treated him, especially Gemma. He couldn’t say anything about it to Harry though, but he would definitely talk to Gemma about it later.

                “I think it would be best for everyone if I just stayed at Niall’s tonight,” Harry said, standing up from his chair.

                “Unfortunately,” Matt replied, standing as well. He reached out and gave Harry a hug and then a smile when he pulled back. “If you change your mind though, you can stay. I’ll make sure you can.”

                Harry nodded. “I know, but no thank you,” he replied. “I don’t want to cause any more problems.” He grabbed his bag and threw it over his shoulder like always. “Tell Jack and Molly I said goodnight. And tell Gemma I’m sorry.” He turned and started towards the front door.

                “Sorry for what?” Matt called loudly so Harry would hear him.

                Harry took a deep breath and opened the door. “That things didn’t turn out peachy.”


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Louis gets an unexpected visitor.
> 
> Harry finally goes through with the plan.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Jesus I finally was able to update. I’m so so sorry for the delay! I’ve been extremely busy. My summer vacation has not been a vacation at all. This week is my last week of my summer class though, so hopefully after I’ll have that free month to write. Anyways, this chapter is probably horrible and really choppy and short. I haven’t edited it and I wrote it quickly. I really needed to get an update out there. Enjoy.

                When the doorbell rang and echoed throughout the Tomlinson house that morning, no one was expecting any visitors. Jay was already downstairs and closest to the front though, so she answered the door. She was happy to see who it was. “James!” she greeted the man excitedly. “Oh my gosh, I can’t believe this! Oh, what a surprise! Come in, come in.”

                James stood tall and he was slightly tanned with a head full of dark, wavy hair. He was in shape but not entirely muscular, and even though he could come off as intimidating, his dark eyes were giving off a light, showing only uncertain kindness. He nodded and smiled. “Hello, and you are…?” he asked, leaving the question open as he stepped inside of the house.

                “Oh, I’m Johannah, Louis’ mother,” she replied cheerfully as she closed the door behind him. “But you can call me Jay.” The two walked into the front living room and when they stopped, they both turned to face each other. Jay was all smile, happy and wide. “Does he know you’re here?” she asked the man. Before she gave him a chance to response, Jay turned and loudly called out, “Lou!” so he would come into the room. “Does he know? Because he didn’t say anything,” Louis’ mother mentioned to James as she turned back around and looked at him.

                James took a nervous breath and shook his head. “No, he doesn’t,” he replied.

                “He doesn’t know you’re here? Well that’s even better!” Jay chirped. “Louis!” she called out again, even louder this time.

                Louis heard his mother’s voice this time so he got up and hurried downstairs. He turned into the front living room. “Yeah?” he asked.

                “Honey, look!” Jay told him, bringing her son forward more. “Can you believe it? Look who’s here!”

                When Louis saw who was standing in the living room, he instantly froze. He just stared over at the man with wide eyes. James looked really nervous and anxious and he was breathing heavily. There was just an awkward yet eerie silence between the two before James finally spoke. “I forgive you,” was what he said.

                Louis’ expression immediately turned cold and he crossed his arms over his chest, staying silent though. Jay looked back and forth between the couple with a look of confusion. Louis let out a huff of air. “Oh, is this what I’m supposed to say too?” he snippily asked back. “I forgive you too?”

                “Forgive me for what, Louis?” James asked back. His tone seemed innocent, but Louis knew the truth. He knew what James had done. He suddenly just felt a surge of anger pulsate through his body and he reached over, grabbing the first object he saw. It was a porcelain vase. He picked it up and threw it at James as hard as he could throw. James quickly dodged the vase and it crashed into the wall behind him, shattering into tiny little pieces on the ground. Louis didn’t miss a beat as he picked up a glass vase this time. He pulled his arm back, ready to throw it, when his mother quickly snatched it from his hands. She sat it down and wrapped her arms around her son, pulling him back and away from any other objects. “Mark!” she yelled loudly for her husband. “Mark!”

                Louis immediately pushed himself away from his mother. “I’m sorry, I’m sorry,” he apologized quietly with an unstable voice. “I’ll clean it up later, I promise. I just—I’m sorry.” He turned and quickly ran back upstairs. He turned, almost running into his dad in the hallway.

                “What the heck is going on?” Mark asked.

                Louis only shook his head and muttered out another apology before running into his room, shutting the door loudly behind himself.

                “What?” Mark asked. He knew Louis wouldn’t be coming back out though, so he made his way downstairs. “What’s going on?” he asked.

                Before anyone had time to answer, there was a knock on the door. Jay turned and opened the door. A young man was hunched over, leaning against the doorframe as if it was the only thing holding him up. He was breathing quickly and heavily, small gasps leaving his lips. “Yeah, yeah, what?” she asked the man, still in shock from the incident that just happened. “Are you selling something?” The man shook his head and opened his mouth to speak, but nothing could come out. “Sorry we’re having a very busy moment right now, please come back some other time.” Jay shut the door on the person and hurried back into the living room. “Why don’t you come into the kitchen?” she asked James. She turned and led the way in. “Why don’t you take a seat, James. Can I get you something?” He shook his head. “Are you sure?” This time he nodded. There was a small silence between the two. “I’m just going to go clean up. Excuse me.” Jay grabbed the broom and dustpan and hurried back out into the living room.

                Mark saw the mess in the living room now and as his wife was coming in to clean it up, he looked at her with a confused expression. She sighed and walked over to him. “James said he forgave Louis,” she explained.

                “For what?” Mark breathlessly asked back. He was out of breath and sore from walking down the stairs, his sick and feeble body hard to move now.

                “I don’t know,” Jay replied back with a shrug.

                “Oh for crying out loud,” Mark muttered and started to head towards the kitchen.

                “Mark,” Jay warned, but her husband ignored her.

                He walked quickly, as fast as he couple into the kitchen. He saw James sitting in one of the kitchen chairs and he headed straight to him. “Forgive him for what?” he asked, knowing he wouldn’t need any explanation.

                James stood up and looked at Mark. “Mr. Tomlinson…” he started slowly.

                “Forgive him for what?” Mark asked again, his voice more stern this time.

                “I really think it’s best if it comes from Louis, sir,” James politely replied.

                Mark stayed quiet as he took a few steps forward and closed the distance between him and the younger male. His arms snapped out and his hands wrapped around James’ neck. He pressed some force down, adding pressure to hurt him slightly but not to choke him. “Forgive him for what?” he asked again, enunciating each word this time.

                James was angry now and he let out a dark chuckle. “He cheated on me,” he finally responded. “With a friend of mine.”

                Mark stared incredulously at James in silence for a little before he let go. “Let’s not share this with his mother,” he ordered.

                James took a step back and inhaled deeply. “Okay.”

_________________________________________

                When Harry woke up in the morning, he was feeling determined. He was the most positive he had been about this situation, and he knew he was ready. Today would be the day.

                After he got cleaned up and ready for the day, he made his way out into the store. The shop wasn’t opened yet, so it was empty. Niall was standing with his wife and kid behind the counter, talking and have a quiet discussion. Harry ran in and jumped on top of the counter and smiled down at the small family. “What do you think?” he asked, spinning around to show off his outfit, though it was the same pajama set he always wore.

                “You look great,” Sierra responded to Harry’s question, laughing softly. Henrie shouted a loud and happy, “Ya!”

                “Thank you,” Harry said before jumping down off the counter. He leaned over and kissed Henrie’s forehead. He pulled back and headed towards the door.

                “Good luck, Harry!” Niall called.

                Harry smiled and nodded before heading out of the store. He turned down the street and began walking down the sidewalk that would take him to Louis’ house.

                On the walk over, he had time to just clear his mind and think, but mostly he only thought about the past. Memories flooded his mind. He could remember walking down this same street with Louis when they were younger. In the fall time, they would see who could crunch the most leaves by stepping on them in the pathway. In the summer, they would walk into town even though it was hot to go buy an ice cream cone together. In the winter, their walks would end up longer because they would always get distracted by the pretty white flakes floating down; they were most competitive then. It was always ‘who could catch the most snowflakes on their tongue?’ or ‘who could build the best snowman?’ Those were truly the best days of his life. After he moved away, after he stopped talking to Louis, he fell into a small pit of despair. He didn’t feel like he could really ever move on, so he just clung onto those happy memories.

                Harry’s reminiscing was interrupted when he finally reached the large white house. He stopped all his moving, staying completely still. He stared down the house like it was an enemy he was getting ready to charge, but that was when his anxiety started to kick in. He was really here. He was really doing this. He was finally going to be face-to-face with the boy he loved again. Harry was already taking quick gasps of air in as he started towards the front porch. His steps were small and slow, but each one inched him closer and closer. By the time he reached the front of the house, he could barely hold himself up. He reached out with a shaky hand, balling it up into a fist before lightly tapping his knuckles on the wooden door. It took a few moments before the door opened. Harry tried to stand up more straight, but he had to still lean against the doorframe to hold himself up.

                Louis’ mother was at the door. She looked a bit frazzled and distraught. Harry stayed silent, wondering—and partially hoping—that she would recognize him, but she didn’t. “Yeah, yeah, what?” she asked quickly, sounding rushed and breathless. Harry swallowed thickly and opened his mouth, trying to speak, but he couldn’t get anything out. His throat was closed up and he was choking on air. “Are you selling something?” Jay questioned when Harry didn’t respond. He immediately shook his head, but she was speaking again before he could chime in. “Sorry we’re having a very busy moment right now, please come back some other time.”

                “Lou—“ Harry finally managed to choke out just as she shut the door in his face.

                Harry wanted to just collapse there. He felt overwhelmed, confused, upset. He had been building up for this moment for years, and what did he get out of it? Nothing. He didn’t even get to speak to Louis. He needed to speak to him. He needed him. Harry took another deep breath and turned around, starting to walk away. Each step he took away from the house, the more he calmed down. He wasn’t sure what he was going to do now. He felt lost, just like his mind was empty and swirling around like a bunch of dead leaves in the cold air. He stopped walking and he glanced up, seeing the tree house that he and Louis used to always play in. Harry smiled weakly and made his way over. Once he reached the tree house, he climbed up the ladder leading up to it. He reached in through the small hole in the door and found the lock, pressing it to the side so he could unlock the door. He pushed open the small frame and ducked, having to crawl in through the tiny space. The inside of the little house looked sad. It was dark and musty, filled with dead, rotten leaves and dirt. To Harry though, the place was still beautiful and alive. He stood up where he reached the portion where the roof was taller and he stretched a bit. He looked around some, a small smile still plastered on his face. Harry crossed over to the other side, reaching up and pulling a small and old lunch box from the top of a shelf. He sat back down onto the floor and pulled the box into his lap, slowly opening it up. Inside of the lunch box were three withered baseballs. Harry picked one up and smiled widely before picking up the other three and standing. He started to juggle the three and he was laughing. He closed his eyes for a brief second and just pictured what it was like as a child. He and Louis would spend hours up here, and Harry would do everything and anything to impress the boy. This was Louis’ favorite though, watching Harry juggle. Harry inhaled deeply and he could picture it perfectly. He could sense Louis right here, sitting and watching and clapping like always. But when he opened his eyes, reality hit him hard. Louis wasn’t here. He was alone. Harry’s smile quickly faded and he let the baseballs drop to the ground before nearly collapsing himself.

                The tree house was as dead to him now as it really looked. And maybe his mind was finally just becoming clearer, but he could feel how pointless this had all been. Even if he got to talk to Louis, even if he got to admit his feelings, there would be no way the boy with reciprocate them. There was no more push in him. The flames had flickered and died and all of his hope washed away along with the light, just letting darkness surround him. Louis used to be his light, his guiding hope, but he seemed so far away, so distant, as if he was gone too.

                Harry was alone.


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Harry finally takes the big leap to talk to Louis. 
> 
> Gemma is on a search for Harry.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I’m so so sorry for the delay! I have no good excuse for why I haven’t been able to update. I haven’t edited it and I wrote it quickly. I really needed to get an update out there. Enjoy.

                After the ordeal, Louis stayed locked up in his room. He softly cried a little bit, but he mostly stayed quiet, losing himself to his thoughts. He didn’t know how James had found out he cheated, and it was really bothering him. He wanted to know. Louis hated being oblivious to anything. He loved having answers. He knew he could get answers from James, but there was no way in hell that he would be seeing him anytime soon. It was hard to see James and to be with him because Louis just wanted out of the relationship; there was just no easy way to end it though.

                When his phone started to ring, Louis was so lost in his thoughts that it scared him, making him jump. He grabbed the phone in a hurry like he was expecting the call, but he honestly had no clue who could be calling him. He felt his stomach knot up when he saw it was James. Louis just let it ring, staring at the picture of his boyfriend on his phone. It was of the two of them, and they looked really happy. It was the only time Louis actually felt happy in their relationship. That was many months ago, at the start. Now Louis was never happy with him. He was tired. So, so tired.

                The phone rang a couple of more times before ending, but a few moments later it rang again. Louis checked and saw that there was a voicemail from James, and when he finally listened to it, there was a short and simple message, “I’m staying at the hotel in town. Come stop by. We need to talk.” Louis quickly erased the message from his phone but he couldn’t erase it from his mind. He sat there and contemplated it for a long time before deciding he needed to go talk to James—so he could finally break up with him.

                Louis got up and put his shoes on and grabbed his phone before hurrying out the door before his parents could see and stop him. He let out a breath of relief and relaxed as he started to walk down the street so he could stay at the hotel. He needed the walk to clear his mind and make sure this was the right thing to do.

                Harry had been up in the tree house still and he saw when Louis left the house. He even ducked down to hide, his breathing going shaky and quick again. Louis just made him so nervous. Once Louis was where he couldn’t see into the tree house any more, Harry quickly got out and headed the opposite way, until he realized what he had come here for the in the first place. He needed to talk to Louis. So Harry quickly turned around and started following behind the smaller boy. He was scared to death, but he forced himself to do this anyways. “Louis…” Harry called out weakly, sounding like a little child that had lost hope when searching for his puppy. “Lou…Louis.”

                Louis heard his name being weakly called from behind him and he sighed, thinking that somehow a fan had seen him and started to follow him. This normally wasn’t a problem. Sure, he was a famous actor on a television show, but people knew him in town whenever he came back home and people hardly ever bothered him. Louis stopped walking and turned around to face the stranger, prepared to greet them happily. “Hello!” He cheerfully said as the person kept walking closer and closer to him.

                Harry’s smile was a mile wide when Louis replied back to him. He sounded happy to see him and Harry was sure that the smaller boy remembered who he was. He must have if he was happy to see him again. “Hi,” Harry greeted him back as he finally caught up to Louis and stopped walking.

                Louis was confused then and he furrowed his eyebrows together. By now, a fan would have asked for an autograph or a picture. This person had done neither. “What could I do for you?” he asked.

                Harry let out a soft breath and his smile immediately vanished from his face. Louis didn’t remember him. He felt that little bit of hope that had come back disappear. He frowned and shook his head before giving Louis a weak smile. “It’s me,” he said. “It’s me, Harry.”

                It took a second before the name clicked and sent Louis’ mind in motion. “Harry?” he asked in surprise and let out a soft chuckle. “Harry! Oh, wow…hi.” Harry’s smile reappeared and he stepped forward, pulling Louis into a hug. Louis hugged the taller boy back awkwardly before pulling back and smiling up at him. “Harry Styles,” he said. “Wow, I can’t believe it. Look at you! How did you—?”

                “I was just walking,” Harry quickly interrupted with his answer. “I was just walking around and I saw you.”

                “Oh wow, that’s really something,” Louis sincerely replied back. He started to walk again and Harry moved to be next to the smaller boy, walking slowly along with him. “How are you?”

                “I’m good,” Harry answered and smiled even more. _Even better now that I’m with you_ , he thought. “How are you?”

                “Oh..I’m fine,” Louis answered back softly, nodding a bit. “Doing just fine…” He stayed quiet for a few and just looked over at Harry, taking him in. “This is just…weird.”

                “Yeah..I know,” Harry replied back, shoving his hands into the pockets of his pajama pants. “It’s been a while.”

                Louis nodded in agreement. “Yeah,” he said softly, turning and looking at Harry. “Look at you, curls!” he loudly said.

                Harry laughed loudly like it was the funniest thing he had ever heard. When he calmed down, he looked at Louis and said, “Look at you, ass!”

                Louis’ expression turned to one of distaste and he cocked his head a bit. “Excuse me?” he asked, on the verge of being angry.

                “Oh!” Harry quickly realized how that sounded wrong. “No, no. You’re not an ass, you just have a great one.” He groaned internally though, realizing that didn’t sound much better. “You’re really pretty, Louis.”

                Louis let out a breathy chuckle then and just accepted Harry’s answer, knowing he probably didn’t mean anything bad by it. “Thank you,” he replied back. “So, how long have you been here?”

                Harry took a deep breath and let it out slowly. “I’ve always been here,” he replied back simply.

                Louis nodded, feeling really confused. “So…you live here then?” he asked, trying to get Harry to clarify. Harry shook his head though. “So…you’re just visiting then?”

                Harry gave up on trying to get Louis to understand what he meant. He was always here, always there with Louis. “Yeah…yeah, I’m just visiting,” he finally said.

                Louis just nodded and stayed quiet again as they walked a bit. He hated this, the small talk and awkward silences, and even though it was really nice to see Harry again, he just wanted to be off on his own way to do what he needed to do. “So, what’s it been? Like…years and years.”

                “It’s been forever,” Harry quickly said, smiling a bit to himself. “Remember that time I came back and visited? I tried to see you then. Me and Niall came over and tried to invite you to go swimming with us but you were at football practice, so you couldn’t come. It’s been since then. Forever.”

                “Oh, yeah,” Louis replied back softly. “Wow, Niall. I haven’t thought about or seen him in a while.”

                Harry suddenly stopped walking and he reached out, stopping Louis from walking even further. “Hey Lou?” he asked, his voice shaking with nerves. “Do you maybe want to go sit and talk somewhere?”

                “Oh, Harry, I can’t,” Louis politely said back. “I’m meeting up with someone. But it was nice seeing you again, really. You look…great.”

                Harry’s heart sunk from Louis’ answer but he forced a smile up and nodded anyways. “Okay,” he said back quietly. “And Louis, you look…beautiful.”

                Louis couldn’t help but smile from Harry’s compliment and he let out a soft laugh. “Thank you, Harry.”

                Harry nodded again and let out another breathy chuckle. “But I would also say it looks like you’ve been through hell.”

                This caught Louis off guard and he just stayed quiet again. He could see what Harry was trying to do, and in the end, he decided to just let it happen. Besides, Harry just wanted to talk. What harm could come from that? “Well, do you want to walk me to where I need to be?” he asked.

                “Sure,” Harry said back before they started to walk again.

_________________________________________

                Gemma and her husband Matt had been talking a lot about Harry lately and they finally came up with a conclusion, although it was pushed mainly by Gemma. Matt didn’t feel that the solution his wife came up with was a reasonable and fair one, but Gemma overruled Matt’s arguments.

                So that day, Gemma drove to Niall’s guitar shop where she knew Harry would be. She walked in with quick strides, looking like she definitely had a purpose and a reason. She walked up to the counter that the blonde man was sitting behind. “Hey Niall,” Gemma greeted him. “Is my brother here?”

                “He’s not,” Niall said back, looking up at Gemma and smiling. His expression quickly turned to one of confusion though as he added in, “Today’s the big day. Did you not know that?”

                “Know what?” Gemma asked back.

                “He finally went to Louis’ house,” Sierra interjected, sounding happy and proud.

                Gemma bit her lip angrily and shook her head. “You see, this is the problem,” she muttered. “This is the thing—“

                “What thing?” Sierra worriedly interrupted.

                Gemma sighed in annoyance before continuing. “He’s sick, okay?” That immediately caused panic to spread over both Niall and Sierra’s faces. “Somebody has to do something. Somebody has to step in.”

                Niall stood up then, walking out from behind the counter and up to Gemma. “What are you talking about?” he carefully asked. “What do you mean he’s sick?”

                “Just look at him,” Gemma answered as if it should have been an obvious answer. “I mean, who is he even talking to half of the time?”

                Niall frowned then. “Gemma…you know exactly who he’s talking to,” he pointed out.

                Gemma rolled her eyes. “Oh really? I do?” she asked back sarcastically.

                “Your mother and father,” Sierra said, smiling softly.

                Gemma let out an angry huff of air. “You know what he thinks about his mother and father?” she asked. She waited for a second before continuing. “He thinks they went to a Broadway show on a Thursday afternoon. A matinee on a Thursday? No, that doesn’t happen.” Niall shook his head some, not liking where Gemma was going with this. “Did you ever see my father without a cigarette in his hand? No. My mother was off taking him to cancer treatments, radiation for lung cancer and liver cancer. And how do I know all this? My mother told me…when I was eleven.” Gemma paused to take a deep breath. “He wants to believe in this fairytale…our beautiful mother, our handsome father, fucking Prince Charming and Cinderella. Matinee, my ass. Everything was as bad as it could get and then it only got worse.”

_________________________________________

                Going on this walk with Louis had been one of the best moments of Harry’s life so far, or at least he would say that. Him and Louis got to talk a lot. It brought all of his hope back into his mind and his heart swelled with more love for the smaller boy, even though it seemed it was impossible to love him even more. But all of the happiness soon faded away when they finally reached a hotel and Louis announced that his was where he was heading to. “I have to go,” Louis said as he walked up to the stairs that led up to the hotel. He stopped though, holding onto the railing and turning to look back at Harry.

                Harry walked up to the smaller boy and smiled as he looked down at him. “Well it looks to me that you’re not too crazy about going in,” he said.

                Louis smiled weakly because Harry was right about that. He would just run away and avoid James for the rest of his life if he could. “I have to, Harry,” he replied back sadly.

                The realization that Louis was really about to leave hit Harry hard and he started to breathe a bit heavier. He couldn’t help but feel a bit happy to know that now he was having anxiety about Louis leaving rather than himself being next to Louis. But he knew he needed to get it out now before Louis could leave, before anything could happen and the chance would be gone. “Louis,” Harry started slowly. “There’s something I’ve been wanting to tell you for a long time. A long, long time.” Harry’s took a moment to catch his breath. “Bobby’s is right up around the corner…we used to go there all the time. Maybe we can sit down in Bobby’s and I can buy you a soda and um…I’ll tell you what I have to say.” Harry shook his head and smiled a bit as he added in, “It won’t take long, I promise.”

                Louis looked back and forth between the hotel and the curly haired boy standing right in front of him and he sighed. “I really can’t, Harry,” he finally said.

                “Okay,” Harry replied back politely but stepped even closer to Louis. “But if you don’t go with me, then I’m going to wrap myself around your leg and you’ll have to drag me around wherever you go for the rest of your life.”

                Louis started to laugh loudly and Harry swore he could’ve died happily right there. Louis’ laugh was the greatest thing he had heard and he missed it so much. It was great to know he was the reason for it. Louis turned and looked at the hotel one last time before looking back to Harry. “C’mon,” He said, taking Harry’s hand and pulling him down the street towards Bobby’s.

                Louis couldn’t lie to himself and say he wasn’t nervous about skipping out on meeting up with James, but he definitely could say that he was happy to be spending this time with Harry again.


	8. Chapter 8

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Louis and Harry have a nice long chat where Harry finally does what he has been waiting to do for a long time.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Finally getting another upload out there. This chapter is a bit longer. I hope it’s up to standards because I had a harder time writing this. Only a few more chapters left….it’s a short fic, sorry! Thanks so much for everything. Enjoy!
> 
> Also, just want to add in that there is a mention of violence and some blood in this chapter. Just a warning!

                “Do I really look terrible, Harry?”

                Louis and Harry had started to walk into town more to head to Bobby’s, but they stayed silent. Harry wasn’t too fond of the silence. Since this was probably his only chance to talk to Louis, he wanted there to be conversation between them, but he couldn’t complain because he was so happy that Louis even agreed to come. But now when they were just heading up to the shop, Louis finally asked that question.

                “Oh, yeah, you look _horrible_ ,” Harry replied back sarcastically, laughing some.

                “Really?” Louis asked with a hint of surprise in his voice, but he wasn’t laughing. He was taking this seriously.

                “No, no….” Harry finally said, his voice trailing off as they reached Bobby’s. “What you look is…tired. That’s all.” He reached for the door handle before Louis could and quickly opened the door for him. Louis smiled politely as he entered the small restaurant and looked around.

                Harry walked in and immediately stopped when he saw how different the placed looked. When he and Louis were younger and came here all the time, the place was an actual restaurant, a little hamburger and milkshake joint. Now it was a sports bar, with a loud and dark atmosphere. He didn’t like it as much. His thoughts were interrupted though as he heard a phone ringing, and he looked over to see Louis pulling out his cell phone. There was a picture on the front of Louis with a guy, but before he could speculate anything, Louis ignored the call and pocketed his cell phone again. He looked up at Harry and flashed him an innocent grin. Harry glanced over and smiled in surprise. “Look!” he cheerfully said. “Those are our stools. They kept the same stools.”

                Louis glanced over to where Harry was pointing and he saw the stools lined up against the bar and he smiled and nodded. They were the same old stools with the same old brown leather seating. It was the only thing that hadn’t been changed about the restaurant it seemed. Harry grabbed onto Louis’ hand and pulled him through a small crowd of people before they were at the bar. Only two stools were preoccupied at the moment and Harry walked up to those. A man with long blonde hair and big muscles sat in one, and a tiny woman with short brown hair sat next to him. They were close and whispering to each other, obviously flirting, but Harry didn’t care. He tapped the man on the shoulder. “Hey, pal,” he said politely. “Do you mind moving over a couple of stools?”

                The guy spun around in his stool and looked at Harry incredulously. “Why?” he asked.

                “Well, you’re not going to believe it, but years ago this used to be a little restaurant,” Harry replied back. “And those…” he said, pointing to the two stools the couple was sitting in. “Were our stools,” he finished, then pointing at Louis. “Would it be okay if you just moved over?”

                The man glanced back at Louis, who was staring apologetically back at him, before he turned around and faced Harry again. “No,” he said. “It wouldn’t be okay.” He turned his stool back around then to face the lady he was with.

                “Really?” Harry asked, causing the man to spin back around and look at him. “Yeah…really,” he the man replied back with annoyance in his tone.

                Harry let out a small huff of air and stood up then. “Wow, I can’t believe that,” he said. Louis was shaking his head and making a motion with his hand for him to come back. To him, it wasn’t a big deal. They could just go sit anywhere else. Harry wasn’t ready to let it go, though. He stood in front of the two stools and looked down. “I’m really curious as to why you wouldn’t just move,” he said.

                The guy took no time before standing up and moving close to Harry. He shoved him back then and stared at him menacingly. “Fuck off,” he said. He went to throw a punch but Harry quickly caught the guy’s fist and stopped him. “Okay, look,” Harry slowly said, laughing softly to himself. “You want to fight? Let me tell you something, you picked the perfect guy because you will _destroy_ me. I don’t know what it is, I just don’t have any fighting skills at all. The idea of getting punched in the nose, just…the sound—the crunch—it just really messes with my mind. My face is my favorite place, it’s a no-hitting zone. You can hit my shoulder though! Go on, punch me in the shoulder—no, no wait! Don’t! That’s my second favorite place on my body.”

                The woman that was with the man laughed and stood up, grabbing his hand. “Come on, let’s just go.” The man looked over at Louis and back to Harry before scoffing and then leaving to go over to a table on the opposite side of the room.

                Harry grinned then and took Louis’ hand, leading him to the stools. “Our stools,” he announced, taking a seat in the one he used to sit in all the time as a kid. “Remember how these used to spin?” he asked once Louis was sitting next to him. He pushed off the bar top, his stool only spinning a little bit. “Mine’s all locked up now. Try yours,” he said, looking back up to the smaller lad.

                Louis looked around the room and shook his head. “No, Harry,” he said back quietly. He was too embarrassed to do something like that in public. Harry just grinned cheekily and reached out, spinning Louis in the stool himself and after a little bit Louis finally began to laugh. Harry stopped Louis’ stool and smiled widely, laughing a bit himself. He suddenly looked over his shoulder. “You see,” he said. “Louis’ back.” Before Louis could even question anything, Harry spun around to meet the bartender. “Could you get me the cheapest bottle of champagne that you have?” he asked. The bartender nodded and walked away. Harry looked back over his shoulder and looked behind him. “Look at Mr. Big Shot ordering booze,” he mumbled, laughing to himself.

                Louis stayed silent for a while before finally deciding to ask. He cleared his throat loudly to get Harry’s attention. “What are you doing?” he asked.

                “We’re celebrating!” Harry almost immediately replied as he looked back to Louis, all smiles.

                “No, not that,” Louis replied. “I mean…when you’re talking…to yourself, to no one. What are you doing?”

                Harry looked at him incredulously for a few before answering, “You know who I’m talking to.”

                “No, I don’t,” Louis replied softly.

                “You do know though.”

                “No, Harry, I really don’t.”

                “Yeah, you do,” Harry said again, smiling as he motioned behind him. “Go on, say hello. They’ve been missing you.” The small smile that Louis had dropped and he looked at Harry with a mixed expression of confusion and worry. “ _’Don’t you know you will always be loved’_ ,” Harry added in, repeating what Louis had told him back when his parents passed away.

                Louis let out a shaky breath and swallowed thickly. “Oh, Harry,” he said sadly, his eyes immediately feeling with tears. He reached forward and pulled the boy in for a hug, holding him tightly. Harry gripped onto Louis’ shoulder and let out a few shaky breaths of his own. He was holding on tightly, never wanting to let go. He couldn’t believe it. Louis was holding him. Louis was holding him. “Oh, Harry,” Louis said again softly, taking a deep breath to keep the tears in. “Alright?” Harry asked worriedly. Louis let out a watery laugh and nodded weakly. “Yeah, I’m fine,” he said, breaking the hug and pulling back. “I’m good.”

                “Here you go, sir,” the bartender said as he handed Harry the bottle of champagne. Harry paid for it with the little money he had left and stood up, grabbing the bottle with one hand and taking a hold of Louis’ with his other. “C’mon,” he said, dragging him off the stool and out the door. He led him down to a park that was between their houses, never letting go of his hand. It was dark and chilly out now, the park desolate of any children. They headed over to the jungle gym and sat up on it, staring out at the night sky and staying silent besides their soft breathing.

                Louis’ cell phone began to ring, interrupting the silence. He pulled it out of his pocket and saw that it was James calling him again. He quickly ignored it and put it away. “What is wrong with me, Harry?” he asked.

                “What do you mean?” Harry curiously asked back.

                “I said that I was fine, but I’m really not. I feel like I’m going crazy,” Louis started. “Why does everything have to be so hard? Why can’t it be easy? I just have to keep on pretending and pretending and pretending to just keep myself from falling apart and bawling my eyes out.”

                Harry nodded slowly and let out a soft breath. “Maybe you have a lot to cry about,” he said, giving Louis a weak smile before holding up the bottle of champagne. “Do you want any of this?” Louis shook his head. “Yeah, I don’t either,” Harry added in. He quickly jumped down from the jungle gym and reached his hand out for Louis to take, smiling widely. “C’mon,” he said. Louis was hesitant, but he took a hold of Harry’s hand and jumped down, running alongside with him. Harry threw the bottle of champagne in a trash bin when they passed by it, and he stopped running when they reached the merry-go-round. He helped Louis on it before starting to spin it around quickly. Louis began to laugh loudly, causing Harry’s heart to thump wildly. Louis’ laugh was beautiful and it was the cure for everything wrong with him. “Stop! Stop!” Louis said loudly through his giggles and Harry slowed down the merry-go-round, stopping it completely.

                Harry waited a moment before getting onto the merry-go-round and sitting on the handles next to Louis. It was silent between the two for a while before Harry looked down and pointed at a spot on his thigh. “I can’t feel anything right here,” he said.

                Louis raised his eyebrows a bit before looking up at Harry. “You can’t feel anything?” he asked back. “Why not?”

                “Remember when they first put the merry-go-round into the park?” Harry asked. He paused for a second before continuing. “I wanted to prove to you that I wasn’t scared to go on the merry-go-round, so I got on and some of the neighborhood kids pushed it really fast. I couldn’t hold on anymore and I fell over and scraped my leg really bad. Ever since then, I can’t feel anything in that little spot.”

                Louis’ expression softened and he smiled a bit. “Yeah…I remember that,” he said back truthfully, laughing a bit. “I remember that. Close your eyes.” Harry nodded and did as he was told and closed his eyes. He was a bit anxious, wondering what would happen. Louis reached forward and laid a finger on the spot on Harry’s leg. “Do you feel this?” he asked. Harry grinned and shook his head. Louis poked a little bit harder. “How about now?” Harry shook his head again and opened his eyes and looked up into Louis’.

                Harry took a deep breath and stepped off the merry-go-round. “Let’s walk some more,” he said, taking Louis’ hand again and pulling him off. They walked together down a pathway for a little bit, once again in silence. This time, Louis was the one who broke it. “You know that person I was supposed to go meet today?” he asked. Harry nodded and slowly looked over to the smaller boy. “Well…he came over to my house today, and I started throwing things at him.”

                Harry stopped walking then, turning to look at Louis with a confused expression. Louis stopped walking too and he bit his lip and looked up at Harry. “Is he a friend of yours?” Harry asked.

                Louis let out a quiet sigh before answering, “He wants to marry me.”

                The words stabbed Harry’s heart and ripped it into a million pieces. His eyes began to pool up with tears that he couldn’t fight back, but he didn’t let them go just yet. Louis started to walk again and Harry stayed behind, trying to catch his breath and trying to compose himself. A moment later he started walking and he quickly caught up to Louis. “Well…I guess with all the…throwing things at him, that you’re leaning towards not wanting to marry him back,” he guessed, well hoped really. What chance would he have with Louis if he ran away and got married?

                “I kind of met someone else,” Louis said.

                Slowly, it felt like a few pieces of Harry’s heart came back together as he wished and hoped that the other person Louis was talking about was him. “Oh…” he said slowly. “Okay? Someone else.”

                Louis let out a sigh and shook his head as he stopped walking and turned to face Harry again. “I cheated on my boyfriend with another guy,” he finally admitted. “I was so selfish. What else could I do?”

                Harry stopped walking and he took a step closer to Louis, reaching out and taking a hand. “If you…if you hurt the person you really like, then you need to tell them you’re sorry. What else can you do?” Harry couldn’t stand to look Louis in the face anymore, not now at least. He let go of his hand and turned away, continuing to walk down the path. He rubbed at his face some and took deep breaths. The tears were close to falling now, but he still refused to let them go in front of Louis. Louis walked up ahead of Harry and turned around to face him again, stopping him from walking any further. Harry was forced to look at Louis now, not that he really minded no matter how much it hurt. “Do you remember when we were happy?” Harry suddenly asked.

                Louis thought about the question for a moment before smiling weakly. When he opened his mouth, he started to sing softly. “ _’Though the days are long…’_ ”

                Harry couldn’t help but smile as he sang the next line. “ _’Twilight sings a song…’_ ”

                Louis smiled even wider, and the two sang the next part in unison. “ _’Of a happiness that used to be.’_ ”

                Harry laughed a little bit but his smile suddenly dropped and he just stared ahead. Louis’ smile dropped too and he stepped forward. “Come here,” he whispered, pulling Harry into a tight and reassuring hug. He held him there for a while and Harry just grew happy again, grinning widely. When Louis pulled back though, he had a sudden realization and he was looking at Harry with confusion. “Pajamas…” he said softly.

                “Yeah,” Harry said back, nodding a bit. “What?”

                Louis shook his head and let the thought drop his mind. “Nothing,” he replied. “I just…”

                Harry could tell what he was thinking though and he nodded again. “Yeah,” he said. “You saw me, in London.”

                “But, wait…” Louis started, his words trailing away as he tried to fit the pieces together.

                “You put some change in my hat after I was done performing,” Harry continued, smiling happily. “I still have what you gave me,” he added in proudly.

                “But…you didn’t say anything,” Louis slowly stated.

                “I know,” Harry replied.

                “Why?”

                “Because I was waiting,” Harry simply replied.

                “For what?” Louis curiously asked.

                “For now,” Harry immediately answered, smiling sweetly at Louis. He leaned forward and took a deep breath, pressing his lips to Louis’ quickly. His lips tingled and were warm against Louis’ soft and thin pink lips, and it felt like his heart was exploding with happiness. Harry pulled away though, not wanting to intrude and kiss Louis for too long. Harry was all smiles, his eyes shining brightly. “I’ve waited for now every single time.”

                Louis was shocked by the kiss and he took a step back and looked at Harry accusingly. “Wait a minute,” he said a bit sharply. “Have you been following me?”

                “No!” Harry said back, laughing slightly. “I don’t follow you. I go where you are.”

                “You’ve been following me,” Louis said again, his face contorting with a mixture of fear and disgust.

                “No, no,” Harry quickly said, wanting to correct himself and get Louis to understand. “I go where you are.”

                “So you knew I was here?” Louis pointedly asked. “That I came home?” Harry grinned again while nodding. “You followed me all the way from London?”

                “And before that, from Manchester,” Harry added in. Louis let out a huff of air and stepped back away from Harry a bit. “Okay, so…please listen to me, because what I wanted to tell you before, this is it.” He paused, taking a deep breath. “I’m imaging a day…a day where I wake up and know I won’t see you, because you’re moved away or too far gone. Okay? Now, I’m imagining a day where I might see you. I wake up and I know I _might_ see you today, because I’m near you, near where you are. And out of those two days, the one I want to experience every day is the one where I might see you. That’s the day I choose. And how could one step away from you ever be a step in the wrong direction for me? How?”

                Louis let out a shaky breath and stepped back even more. He was teary eyed now, his heart pounding with fear. The thought of someone following him around, seeing everything he was doing, stalking him, really scared him, even if it was his childhood best friend. “Is this a joke?” he asked. Harry looked at Louis with confusion as he shook his head. “Cause I have to tell you something, Harry. If this is a joke, then where’s the punch line? Okay, cause jokes have punch lines, so where is the punch line?” He was desperately hoping this was just some sick joke.

                Harry couldn’t do anything but simply ask “What?” in confusion.

                Louis shook his head in disbelief. “You’re not joking,” he whispered. “You’ve have to stop this! Don’t you see that you have to stop?”

                Harry shook his head, trying to get a grip on what Louis was saying. He shook his head some more, wanting to wake up from this nightmare he thought he was having. “Are you saying that I have to?” he asked.

                 “I’m saying that you have to!” Louis nearly yelled back. “You have to stop!”

                “But I love you Louis,” Harry immediately replied back. He hated that it had to be said in this moment. He wanted it to be more special, but he needed Louis to know. He needed to let him know it was okay and that he wasn’t creepy; he was just in love.

                Louis laughed bitterly and shook his head. “We’re not kids anymore!” he crossly replied. “You can’t love me, you don’t even know me!” Harry opened his mouth to speak but Louis wasn’t letting him get the words out. “You have to promise me something,” he said.

                Harry closed his mouth and quickly nodded. “Anything,” he said back quietly.

                “Promise me that you will not go where I go,” Louis angrily ordered.

                Harry just nodded and whimpered out a quiet, “Okay.”

                “Because this is so wrong, Harry, this is so wrong,” Louis continued in his angry request.

                “What’s wrong?” Harry asked.

                “Everything!” Louis shouted. “Everything is wrong. Life isn’t simple, it isn’t easy. Horrible things happen and people do terrible things Harry, they do. You’re a good person, but you have to stop this…this following me. It’s a terrible thing!”

                Harry let out a choked sob as the tears finally started to pour over his eyes. He looked over to the side and shook his head. “I-I don’t….I-I don’t believe he means this,” he mumbled to his parents.

                “What are you doing? Stop that!” Louis desperately asked, close to tears himself. “Don’t do that!”

                “But Louis,” Harry said, his attention back to the smaller boy. “It was you.”

                “What was me?” Louis demanded.

                “Them,” Harry replied.

                “What?!” Louis asked in surprise. “No.” He shook his head again and took a deep breath. “I want you to promise me, okay? I need you to say it, that you will not follow me anymore.”

                “Why…” Harry started. “Why…Why would I go where you didn’t want me to go?” As much as it hurt him, if Louis didn’t want him around, he would stay away.

                “Just fucking promise me Harry!” Louis shouted. “Say it!”

                “Okay, okay,” Harry quickly replied. “Yes…I …I will stop…” he said, his words so soft there were barely audible.

                Louis didn’t hesitate any time before turning and quickly walking away from Harry.

                Harry let out a scream in frustration and he just dropped down onto the floor, burying his face into his hands as he started to loudly sob.

                The light of hope that always flickered was gone again.

                This time, Harry really knew he was alone.

_________________________________________

                James was pacing back and forth in the hotel room he had paid for. It had been like this for most of the day while he awaited Louis’ return or a call from him or a message or just anything. He gave up and sat down on the bed with an angry huff of air, pulling at his hair a bit as a flashback entered his mind.

_James stormed into the house he was familiar with, hurrying into the living room where he knew his “friend” would be. His friend Chase was in the middle of the room, doing some sit ups. He looked over and sat up when he saw James. “Hey, what’s up?” he asked with a friendly tone._

_“Why did you do this?” James lowly asked._

_“What?” Chase asked in confusion._

_James let out a low almost growl-like noise as he kicked into Chase’s side. Chase let out a yelp in pain and quickly stood up in defense. “What the hell?” he angrily asked._

_"Louis told me,” James angrily replied back, moving forward and gripping onto the collar of Chase’s shirt before throwing him back down onto the floor._

_Realization hit Chase and he let out a huff of air. “Well it’s not like you never not messed around Louis!” he argued. “I only hooked up with him once!”_

_James let out an angry yell as he picked Chase back up and threw him back down, this time on the glass coffee table. It shattered into pieces and Chase fell flat onto the floor, staying still. James took deep breaths to calm himself and that was when he realized Chase wasn’t moving, or even breathing. He hurried over. A small pool of blood was forming underneath Chase’s head, and James just took a deep breath and looked around the room in a panic._

                The flashback was interrupted by a knock on the door and James quickly got up and ran over, opening the door. His breathing was shaky but he was less stressed out when he realized it was just Louis who was there. He stepped to the side to let him in, closing the door once he was inside.

                Louis stayed silent and walked into the room, getting out of the entry way before turning and looking up at James. “Sorry,” he whispered the apology.

                “Oh, Louis, Louis,” James said back, stepping forward and taking Louis’ hands in his own. “I’ve been calling you and your house and your mother said you left hours ago. And I…I, uh, had all these horrible thoughts. I was really worried.” James stepped forward, closing Louis in so the wall was behind his back and he gave him a gentle kiss.

                Louis politely pushed James back a bit and shook his head. “I’m sorry,” he apologized again a bit breathlessly. “I-I’m sorry, I just met this guy and—“

                “A guy?” James interrupted.

                “This guy I knew…” Louis slowly answered. “He’s been following me.”

                James took a small step back. “What do you mean following you?” he asked.

                Louis took a deep breath in and ran a hand through his hair as he walked over to the bed and sat down on it. “It doesn’t matter. I took care of it.” James walked over and stared down at Louis in disbelief, his gut telling him that Louis was lying. Louis took the silence in before looking up to James. “I think that maybe I should go home.”

                Louis stood up but before he could walk forward, James moved ahead and grabbed onto Louis’ arms tightly. “No, no, no, no” he said quickly, pushing him back towards the bed. Louis made a small noise of pain and James quickly let go, forcing Louis to sit down. He squatted down then so he would be more level with Louis and looked up to him. “Stay, sweetheart,” James said, his voice too sweet for his rough handling.

                Louis hesitated before shaking his head. “I’m just so exhausted,” he said.

                James stared at Louis accusingly before getting up and sitting next to him on the bed. “Well, what were you doing with this guy that was so exhausting, hm?”

                “Oh, James,” Louis scoffed. “Nothing like that, stop it.”

                James rolled his eyes and stood back up to face Louis. “What do you mean following you?” he asked again.

                “Look, it doesn’t matter,” Louis shot back.

                “Yes it does matter!” James yelled. “It matters to me!” There was a quiet paused before he asked, “Was he following you in London?” Louis just nodded. “And you know this for a fact?”

                Louis sighed and answered, “Yes.”

                “Well,” James started, letting out an angry huff of air. “What’s his name?” When Louis didn’t respond, James angrily asked the question again. “What’s his name?!”

                “Harry Styles,” Louis finally blurted out, rolling his eyes.

                James took a few deep breaths before walking over, pulling Louis onto his feet and pulling their bodies close together. “I don’t like this sound of this,” he said gently. “It’s dangerous, too dangerous for you to leave tonight.”

                Louis sighed but nodded in defense. “It’s okay, I handled it,” he said again even though he knew he would most definitely have to stay with James tonight. “I threw a vase at you this morning, shouldn’t we be talking about that instead?”

                James chuckled a bit and nodded. “Tomorrow, let’s just start over,” he said, giving Louis a careful kiss. “For now, lie down and get some rest, okay?”

                Louis nodded and did what he was told. He stripped down to his boxers and laid down into the bed, closing his eyes and relaxing. James waited until he knew Louis was asleep before heading into the bathroom. He pulled out his cellphone and called the police department for London. When they finally answered and asked what he was calling for, he replied in a quiet voice so Louis couldn’t hear. “I’d like to report a murder.”


	9. Chapter 9

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Harry gets in some trouble.
> 
> Louis goes back home (again) to be with his family.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is a bit of a longer update, and I was unsure of how to end the chapter so sorry if it really sucks. As of right now, I’m undecided about how many chapters are left. I’ll either have one really long chapter, two shorter chapters, or one short chapter with an epilogue. I’m not sure yet…but either way, this story is almost to an end. Thank you to everyone who has read it! Also, as usual I didn’t edit this, so sorry if there are any mistakes.

                When everything was all said and done, Harry felt absolutely hopeless.

                He didn’t have hope for anything.

                Hell, he didn’t even want to breathe anymore.

                But for some reason, he was able to pick himself up and walk back to Niall’s place. Harry refused to talk though. He couldn’t bear to give his best friend the terrible shattering news that it wasn’t going to work out between him and Louis. He could hardly accept it himself. Niall kept bugging Harry with questions, but Sierra stayed quiet; she had a gut feeling that something had gone wrong, and she knew it was better to not ask questions.

                After a few days of sulking alone in the bed in Niall’s guestroom, Harry decided it was better to move on. He had no clue where he was going; he just knew he had to get out of here. Niall begged Harry to stay, and when he refused, he begged him to at least let him buy him some necessities. They bought Harry a few things, but when it came to clothes he refused to buy anything else besides a new pair of pajamas. So that’s what he got, and it was exactly like his blue pair except it was red. The weather was starting to get colder and a bit harsher, so Sierra sewed a matching hoodie onto the pajama shirt that he could throw up over his head and ears when it got really cold. And once he reassured the loving family that he had everything he needed and that he would be fine, he was off on his way.

                And Harry just walked. And walked. And walked.

                That was all he could do.

                He felt so lost not having some prior knowledge of a destination that he was heading to.

                On this day that he had continued walking, it was a bit chillier, so Harry had his hood up over his head. He was walking in the middle of the street on this highway. He knew it was dangerous, but he didn’t really care. It wasn’t that he was suicidal or wanted death to come; it was just that if he happened to get hit by a car and die, he wouldn’t really complain or be unhappy about it. At least he would be completely reunited with his parents again. He could see them finally instead of just hearing them.

                Only after a few minutes of walking though, a police car pulled up behind him, ringing his sirens a few times before driving up past Harry and pulling to the side. Harry looked over and immediately slowed down his walking. The police officer got out of the car. “Get out of the road,” he said, motioning for him to come over. Harry just obliged his orders and headed over to the officer. “You know there’s no hitchhiking along this high way?” the officer asked.

                Harry looked up at him and shook his head. “No, I didn’t know,” he replied back.

                “Where are you headed to?” the officer asked back.

                “No idea,” Harry immediately responded.

                The cop sighed from the vagueness. “Can I see your identification please?” he asked. Harry nodded and dug his wallet out from his bag. He pulled out his driver’s license and handed it over to the police officer. The officer looked at it for a second before laughing a bit. “Mr. Styles, this driver’s license expired over four years ago.”

                Harry smirked weakly before wittingly replying, “Well, it’s a good thing I’m not driving then.”

                The police officer stared at Harry in silence for a moment, obviously not finding it funny. “Are you still at this address?” he asked. Harry leaned forward and looked at the address on the card and shook his head. The cop crossed his arms over his chest, obviously annoyed. “Can you tell me where your home is now, Mr. Styles?”

                Harry looked up to the gray clouds above him as it started to sprinkle some. When he looked back to the officer, he answered, “Not even close.”

                The officer stared Harry down for a few before saying, “Stay here. I’ll be back in a moment.” He headed back to his car and went inside, typing a few things up on the laptop in the vehicle and making a few calls. Sometime later, he came back out and handed the license back to Harry. “Please come with me, Mr. Styles.” Harry nodded and followed the officer back to the car. He helped Harry into the backseat of the car before getting in himself. They drove in complete silence, and when they reached the police station, the officer pulled Harry out of the car, this time handcuffing him behind his back. Harry winced some, but he stayed completely silent even though he was confused. They brought him into the station and into an interrogation room where they uncuffed him and let him be. Harry lost track of how long it was before more officers and a detective came back into the room. After one of the police officers reminded Harry of his right to silence, the detective announced that he wanted to ask him questions.

                “Why would I remain silent if you want to ask me questions?” Harry answered, sounding genuinely confused.

                “A man was murdered in London,” the police officer started, ignoring Harry’s remark. “He was involved in relations with a…Mr. Louis Tomlinson,” he said as he glanced down at the paper to read Louis’ name off of it.

                “Do you know Louis Tomlinson?” The detective asked.

                “You must know that I do,” Harry stated back.

                “And do you follow Louis Tomlinson?” The officer asked.

                “I used to,” Harry said back.

                “And you don’t follow him anymore?” the detective was the one to ask this time.

                Harry shook his head. “No,” he replied.

                “Why’d you stop following him?” the detective asked.

                “Because he told me to,” Harry answered simply.

                “Do you know where you were on the thirteenth of January?” the police officer asked.

                This question baffled Harry and he stayed silent while he thought about it. He couldn’t remember though, so he asked back, “Do you remember where you were on the thirteenth of January?”

                The detective couldn’t help but chuckle a bit, but the police officer got angry. “We’re not suspects in a murder case, Mr. Styles, you are,” he pointed out. “So…where were you on the thirteenth of January?”

                Harry stayed silent once again, this time really trying to remember. All the places he had been in the past few months were flying through his mind and he was trying to put one and one together. But suddenly, a bunch of different puzzle pieces came to mind and he felt like he was going to be sick. “No,” he whispered in belief, shaking his head. “No…Louis, no.” He quickly looked up to the officer and the detective. “No…no, I-I have to go, I have to go back.”

                “Mr. Styles, that isn’t going to be possible,” the police officer said.

                “A warrant for your arrest has been issued,” the detective added in.

                “I really have to go now,” Harry said, his voice shaking a bit. He quickly stood up from the chair and headed over towards the door. The detective and the officer got up, running over and grabbing onto him. “I have to go!” Harry shouted louder, starting to thrash around, trying to escape them. “Louis!” he yelled out desperately and in a panic when they wouldn’t let him go. Suddenly more officers rushed in and held to bring him down to the floor. “Louis!”

_________________________________________

                In the time that had passed, Louis’ life went back to normal; well, as normal as possible. He stayed with James in the hotel for a few days to patch things up, and also because James still felt it was too dangerous for Louis to leave. They talked everything through, but Louis couldn’t leave him no matter how much he wanted to. He was already losing control of so many things in his life. He needed that stable foundation with him, even if the foundation was a little bit uneven at times. When the topic of marriage came back up between the two, Louis reluctantly agreed to James. He couldn’t say he was really happy with the setup, but his relationship with James wasn’t his first priority right now.

                Louis’ father’s health had started to decline rapidly, so he was able to convince James to let him go back to his home. James only agreed to let him go if he could come too, so of course Louis agreed; he wasn’t going to not go home to his father when the outcome wasn’t looking so good. Jay had made dinner for Mark that night like she always did, and Louis took the tray of food upstairs to him so he could eat it in bed like he did every night. The thing was, though, his father wasn’t one for eating that much anymore. Louis was in denial, and he refused to believe that his father was actually dying, but now his even his once joking and sarcastic father was accepting the fact that death was imminent. All color had vanished completely from Mark’s face, and his body was extremely weak as he had lost a lot of weight from his loss of appetite. On a good day, Mark could get up, with help from either Jay or Louis, and walk downstairs so he could get a different view other than the barren beige walls of his bedroom. Today wasn’t a good day though, and he had been bundled up in bed all day. When Louis and Jay brought the food up to him, Mark made a sour face and shook his head, but Jay was very adamant about him needing to eat. So they all sat in silence while they watched a man so important in their lives struggle to do a simple task such as eating. “I’ll get it,” Louis said once Mark declared he was finished eating, and he picked up the tray, stepping back from the bed. He looked down at the plate and there was barely anything touched.

                Jay scooted closer to the bed and reached out, taking a hold of Mark’s hand in her own and squeezing it gently. “I love you,” she whispered sadly to him.

                “Love you too,” Mark replied in a raspy breath before closing his eyes to rest.

                Louis felt like he was intruding now, and he left to give his mother and father space. He headed downstairs and into the kitchen, sitting the tray of food on the counter before looking over at James, who was sitting on a kitchen chair at the table reading the newspaper and drinking some coffee. Louis sighed and headed over to his side, peeking down at the newspaper to see what he was reading. James quickly closed the newspaper and sat it down, looking up to his boyfriend and wrapping his arms around his waist. “Hey sweetheart,” he mumbled, standing up then and pulling Louis in even closer to him. He could tell Louis was having a tough time. “Do you want to go for a drink?” he asked.

                Louis thought about it for a second before nodding. He wasn’t going to get drunk, but a drink sure did sound really nice right now. He just needed something to take the stress away. He grabbed his jacket before heading outside with James.

                They walked instead of taking a car. Even though it was cold outside, the night was beautiful, and Louis needed the nature and the silence to just let his mind settle anyways. When they reached their destination, Louis glanced up at the building and let out a heavy sigh. Of course it was Bobby’s. The two headed inside and James immediately led them over to the bar, taking a seat on the stool. After Louis was seated next to him, he looked around a bit. His bar stool spun around and it was then where he realized they were sitting; they were on the stools that Harry and he had sat on as little kids. While James was looking over the wine menu, Louis looked out to nowhere in particular, losing himself in his mind. He shook his head a bit in disbelief. No matter how hard he tried, he couldn’t stop thinking of Harry.

                “What?” James asked, finally catching Louis’ attention.

                Louis looked over to him and shook his head once more. “I just can’t wrap my mind around something,” he said.

                James cocked his head a bit and gave Louis a look. “About what?” he asked, reaching out and placing his hand on his knee.

                “About…Harry,” Louis answered. “I just picture this little kid, this little boy I used to know, and I can’t seem to understand how he could do such a thing.”

                James looked annoyed at the topic of Harry, but when he spoke, his voice was gentle. “You know…sometimes things just happen. You just need to move on. It’s alright. Just move on.”

                “Here you go,” the bartender said, setting out two glasses of red wine on the bar top before leaving to take another order.

                James slid one of the glasses over to Louis before taking the other one himself, sipping on it a bit. Louis took a drink too, letting the bitter taste settle on his tongue before swallowing the sip. James lifted up his glass then and smiled widely at Louis. “Here’s to us,” he said.

                Louis held onto his glass tightly as he glanced up at James, staying silent and still. He wouldn’t move to clank his glass with James’. He wouldn’t dare to celebrate. He couldn’t find it in himself to be happy. “We have to wait, James,” he finally said. “We have to wait. My dad is either going to get better, or he’s not. It’s not good this way, for him or for us, to worry about all this stress of planning a wedding and trying to get married, or planning a funeral. Why should we have to rush like this?” James stayed completely silent, glaring at Louis slightly. “You should go back home,” Louis continued. “I’m going to stay here. It’s only right; I have to be with my family.”

                “Am I not family?” James asked back, his tone a bit harsh.

                Louis immediately regretted his words. He wanted to take everything back and swallow it up and just leave it to settle as guilt in his stomach. He couldn’t stand up to                 James. It was too terrifying. “No, you are,” he quickly defended himself. He closed his eyes and took a deep breath, mentally encouraging himself to do this. “You are family, but I need this time alone to be with my father and mother.”

                James seemed to calm down a bit, but the anger was still present in his expression and his tone. “For how long?”

                “However long it takes,” Louis replied back softly, his voice laced with slight fear as he opened his eyes and looked to him. “I’m sorry James, but that’s just how it is going to be.”

                James stayed silent for a few minutes, leaving Louis in utter terror and his heart pounding. “Okay,” James finally replied back. He picked up his glass of wine and chugged the rest of the alcohol down before slamming his glass onto the bar top. He stood up and quickly left the bar without another word.

_________________________________________

                “Wake up, let’s go.”

                Harry looked up to see the barred door of the jail cell was slid open and there was a guard standing there talking to him. He stood up from the cold metal bench he was laying on and quickly put the hood up over his head again as he headed out and followed the guard out. He was led through another door and out into the front of the jail. When he looked up, he saw Gemma at the desk signing some papers. The guard walked Harry up to her. “He’s free to go,” he said before leaving Harry there.

                Gemma finished signing the papers and she looked up and over at her brother. “Thanks for coming so far to get me,” he told her, his voice raspy and weak from all the crying he had been doing. “I’ll pay you back.”

                Gemma smiled weakly before saying, “C’mon, let’s go.” She grabbed Harry’s bag and handed it to him before taking his hand and leading him outside to where the taxi was waiting for them.

                They both got inside and it was eerily silent as the cab took off. Gemma tapped her fingers on her leg as Harry leaned forward a bit and started to cry again. She eventually looked over to her brother. “Did they treat you well?” she asked. Harry sniffled loudly, tears running down his face as he nodded in response. “Look, they don’t have any evidence on you. That’s why they let you go. It’ll be okay.” Harry just weakly nodded but started to cry harder. Gemma’s own eyes were tearing up a bit and she looked out the window, trying to push the tears back. “I know you didn’t do this, I know you didn’t.” She reached over and patted Harry’s leg, but she didn’t know she was actually hitting the spot where he couldn’t feel anything. Harry looked down at her hand and let out a shaky breath before reaching and grabbing onto her hand, needing to feel her comfort. “You’re going to have to do a lot though, okay?” Gemma continued. “You’re going to have to get a lawyer, and you’re going to get your act together, okay?”

                “I’ve been trying, I promise,” Harry replied back weakly, letting out a watery laugh as he sniffled again and cleared his throat. “I just can’t stop crying.”

                “Harry, you just have to pull it together,” Gemma said.

                Harry nodded again and took deep breaths, sitting up a bit. He suddenly went quiet, just staring ahead of him. “Gemma?” he softly asked.

                “Yeah, Harry?” she asked back.

                “Everything’s not peachy,” Harry lowly said back, shaking his head. “There…there aren’t any matinees on Thursdays.”

                The realization that Harry knew the truth hit Gemma hard. Even though she got annoyed with his childish behaviors, she was always happy that Harry didn’t know how crappy things were for their parents. But now she knew that he did know the truth, maybe not the whole truth, but part of it. It killed her that she couldn’t keep her little brother happy anymore. She couldn’t keep him hidden behind the lies. She couldn’t keep him in this little fairytale he created for himself.

                “I-I’m s-sorry,” Harry choked out before he started to sob softly into his hands.

                Gemma couldn’t handle it anymore as she started to cry, silently though, a few tears streaming down her face. She reached over and wrapped her arms around Harry and pulled him in close, rubbing his back and just holding him, trying to give him any comfort that she had neglected to give him over the years.

                The siblings stayed this way for the rest of the trip until they reached the airport. Gemma got out with Harry, carrying his bag for him this time as they headed inside and over to the counter where you could buy plane tickets. Gemma bought Harry a plane ticket so he could go back to Holmes Chapel to try and get a new, fresh start. After they bought the ticket, they went over to the waiting area to sit. Only two seats were open, so the two took those seats and sat there in silence again. Harry grabbed his bag and started to look through it, pulling out a yellow envelope. He grabbed a handful of the money that was in there and passed it over to Gemma. “Shit, what is that?” she asked, looking down at the money.

                “It’s from the train wreck,” Harry said back. They had both received a nice sum of insurance money when their parents died in the accident. Harry had always kept onto the money, saving it for emergencies only. “It’s for the bail. I’m paying you back.”

                Gemma shook her head and handed the money back to Harry. “Put that away,” she hissed in a whisper. “Do you just carry that around with you everywhere?” Harry nodded but stayed quiet as he put the money back into his bag. “Hey,” Gemma said, smiling a bit over at Harry. “You have a sister who is a banker. I don’t need the money. Keep it.”

                There was silence between the two again, so Gemma went back to looking at her cell phone. Harry just stared at the floor, but when he spoke back up, his voice was hesitant and soft. “Is…Is Louis still at home?”

                Gemma slowly looked up to her brother and sighed heavily. “He’s getting married,” he said. “You have to let him go.”

                Harry closed his eyes, fighting back the tears, but he nodded. He couldn’t let Louis go, no matter how much he tried, and the thought of him actually going through with the marriage made him sick, especially when he heard and seen how Louis seemed so unhappy with the guy. Harry quickly stood up, needing to get away. “I’m going to go buy some water. Do you want anything?” Gemma was looking back at her phone and she shook her head. “Gummy bears?” Harry asked, smiling widely, knowing those were her favorite.

                Gemma finally looked up at Harry and smiled too. “Okay,” she said back before looking back down at her phone. “Gummy bears.”

                Harry smiled some more and he grabbed his back, pulling out the envelope of money again. He carefully sat it down in his seat before walking away.

                After some time had passed, an announcement came on the intercom that Harry’s flight was boarding soon. Gemma looked over at his seat, frowning when she saw the envelope of money there. She quickly picked it up and hurried out to where all the shops were. She looked around for Harry, finding him nowhere though. “Harry!” She called out as she quickly searched all over the airport for him, but she gave up eventually, knowing that Harry was gone.

_________________________________________

                The next morning when Louis woke up alone in his bed, he knew he made the right decision. It made him sad, because he knew that he should love James, but he just didn’t, at least not anymore. It was wrong that he felt happier waking up alone than waking up next to his fiancé or boyfriend or whatever he was anymore. His mind just felt clearer and focused though, and he knew he needed to just spend this time with his family now.

                Louis quickly got showered and dressed, getting ready for the day. He ate a quick bowl of cereal for himself while making some oatmeal for his mother and father. Jay happily ate a bowl, but when he tried to feed some to Mark, his father refused. It was frustrating to see his dad give up, but no matter what he said or did, he couldn’t seem to push the man anymore.

                Even with starting off the day on a bad note, Louis thought the day was going to be a good one. They were able to get Mark up out of bed and walk down so he was sitting outside on the back patio because he claimed he wanted some fresh air. They kept him wrapped up in coats and blankets though.

                Louis sat next to his father in the patio chairs, looking down at the container of pudding he had in his hand. He had been feeding his father a little bit here and there, but he was just starting to get frustrated again. Louis scooped some more pudding onto the spoon and held it up by his father’s mouth. “Here,” he said. “Have some more." Mark had his eyes closed and his hands crossed over his chest. He shook his head side to side slowly. “It’s tapioca, your favorite,” Louis added in.

                Jay headed outside on the patio and handed a letter over to Louis. “You got mail,” she said, sounding a little confused. “Who do you know in Holmes Chapel?” she asked. She walked over to Mark then, giving him a kiss on the forehead before heading inside to finish making the tea. Louis looked down at the letter in confusion as he opened it and pulled out the contents. There was a sticky note and a piece of paper on the inside. He opened up the piece of paper then and read it:

                 _Please call these people. They will tell you I was with them on the day that your friend died. I am sorry about all of this. I’m thinking of your dad. - Harry_

                “Who _do_ you know in Holmes Chapel?” Mark asked slowly in a gravelly voice.

                Louis looked at the letting once more and then the sticky note before looking up to his dad. “Harry,” he replied. Mark just shook his head a bit. “I’ll be right back, okay?” Louis said before getting up and heading inside. He took out his cell phone and dialed the number that was on the sticky note and waited.

                After a few rings, someone answered it. “Hello?”

                "Hi,” Louis said back, unsure of how to start this. “Is this….” He looked back down to the sticky note. “Liam or Zayn Malik?”

                “This is Liam,” he replied back. “How could I help you?”

                Louis took a deep breath. “I actually had a few questions to ask,” he started. “I was wondering if you knew about my friend Harry.”

                “Oh, Harry!” Liam replied back happily in excitement, recognizing the name from the lad they had picked up on the side of the rode. At least he was pretty sure that was who this person was talking about since he only knew of one Harry. “Harry pajamas?”

                Louis couldn’t help but laugh a little bit. “Yeah, Harry pajamas,” he replied. “His name is Harry Styles, and he was…well, is a friend of mine. I got a letter from him and he told me to call you because you would be able to verify to me that he was with you on the day that a crime happened.” Louis went into more details then, explaining about the murder case.

                “Thank you so much for letting me know, I’ll most definitely tell the authorities that Harry’s alibi is true,” Liam said after listening to what Louis had to say. “You do me a favor. If you ever come across Harry again, please give him our number again and tell him to give me a call. Zayn and I would love to help him out in any way possible.”

                “What?” Zayn grumpily asked, hearing his name brought up in the conversation. “Who are you talking to?”

                “It’s about Harry!” Liam said back to Zayn. It suddenly hit him though that he never got a name and he didn’t know who he was talking to. “By the way, who am I speaking with?”

                “My name is Louis Tomlinson,” he replied back.

                Liam let out a heavy breath. “Oh, Louis,” he said, instantly remembering the name from Harry’s story. “Oh, Louis. You have to go find Harry, you have to. He needs you.”

                Louis just chuckled a bit but then sighed. “Right well,” he started. “I have to go now. Take care of this for me, please?”

                “I will,” Liam promised.

                “Thank you,” Louis replied before hanging up. He sat his phone down and shook his head.

                Louis sat down in the living room, shaking his head a bit as he thought it all through. He had no idea how Harry got caught up in this murder, especially if he was out of town when it happened. It just seemed coincidental to him that the guy he cheated on James with got murdered suddenly, and somehow Harry’s name was brought up into. The only people that knew about Louis cheating was Harry and James, but Harry didn’t know who the guy was, only James did.

                It suddenly hit Louis really hard and he let out a shaky breath. “No,” he whispered softly to himself, shaking his head in disbelief. He realized now that James must’ve been the one to frame Harry since he learned his name through Louis, which meant that James had to have known about or been the reason for Chase’s murder.

                Louis quickly jumped up and ran out onto the bad porch. “Dad!” he said in a bit of a panic. “Dad!” he walked out and looked over at Mark who was completely colorless and still now. “Dad?” he asked slowly. He swallowed thickly and began to tear up. “Dad?” he asked again, receiving no kind of response whatsoever. “Mum!” He called out loudly then. “Mum!”

                “What is it?” Jay asked as she headed out. She immediately glanced over at Mark and saw how he looked. “Mark,” she whispered, dropping down by his chair and rubbing his face a bit. “Mark, wake up,” she begged him desperately but he didn’t move. Jay turned and looked back at Louis, tears already falling. “He’s gone, baby,” she got out before starting to cry hard.

                Louis let his sobs come out then too and he hurried over, pulling his mother in closely and holding her in tightly. He sobbed into her should, letting all his anger, pain, sadness, fear, worry, just letting everything out that he was holding onto for so long.


	10. Epilogue

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Louis has a change of heart and goes on a search for Harry

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well, this fic has come to an end. I really hope you enjoyed it, and I’m so thankful to everyone who read it. Thank you so much! I’m so sorry for the cheesy ending, I wasn’t sure what else to write, but I hope you liked it. As usual, I didn’t proofread so sorry for any mistakes.

                Louis headed inside of the small café in town that was the new local hangout for all the young people. It wasn’t his place of choice, but it would work for what he needed. He kicked the dirt off his shoes when he entered before looking up, seeing the blonde man sitting at a table, drinking coffee. Louis headed over to the table and smiled politely at him. “Hello,” he said as he took a seat across from him.

                Niall looked up from the newspaper he was reading and smiled widely at Louis. “Nice to see you again!” he cheerfully replied back. “Glad you could make it.”

                “Me too,” Louis agreed. “Thanks for meeting me here.”

                “Yeah, sure,” Niall replied.

                “It’s been so long…” Louis started slowly. He paused and took a deep breath. He didn’t want to start the small talk. It was just terrible. He hated it and was never good at it. “Look, um,” he said instead, deciding to just get down to business. “Niall, I’m afraid I’ve just been making messes.”

                Niall inhaled deeply and nodded. “From what I’ve heard, you’ve had somewhat of a rough year,” he said.

                And what Niall said was true. Louis had to deal with his parents brief marital problems that they eventually worked out, and he had to deal with his father’s sickness and his passing. On top of that, Harry’s antics were at the top of his worry list for a while, and include all the stress James brought along just topped everything off. Since his father’s passing, things eased up a bit though. Louis had tipped to the police that James might have been involved with Chase’s murder, and they found enough evidence and had him arrested. Since then, Louis had not spoken to James once, and he considered them done forever. Louis and his mother were finally starting to move on.

                “Who did you hear that from?” Louis asked, his tone sounding a bit surprised.

                Niall shrugged and sighed. “From Harry,” he said, not able to lie.

                “Harry…yeah…” Louis said back slowly, nodding a bit. He looked down to the table for a bit, thinking about if he was really going to do this or not. Harry caused a lot of problems for him, but he also caused a lot of problems for him as well. “He’s actually the reason I called you,” he said as he looked back up to the blonde man. “I’ve just been feeling so bad lately about all the terrible things that have happened to him because of me,” he started. “I know that he stayed with you when he was here, so I figured you two would be in touch.” Louis chuckled a bit. “I don’t even know why he liked me,” he suddenly blurted out.

                Niall’s eyes widened in surprise from that. “Liked you?” he asked back, laughing some himself. “This kid was crazy about you!”

                Louis winced a bit at the choice of words but laughed none the less. “Look, um,” he started again. “If you talk to him, will you tell him how sorry I am?” He knew it was a terrible apology, but it was better than no apology. He hated that he couldn’t tell Harry that himself, but he had no clue how to get in touch with him.

                Niall nodded. “Yeah, of course,” he said back.

                And that was that. Louis left the café in hopes that word would get to Harry, and he even had hopes that somehow, word from Harry would get back to him. He found himself needing a response of some sort in the few days that passed after he met up with Niall. Deep down inside he knew he wouldn’t get one though. Why should he? Even though it was weird that Harry was following him around, Louis treated him like shit. He knew if he never heard from Harry again that he deserved it. But he couldn’t help think back to the times they were children, and even the time they had briefly spent together before Louis wished him away. He enjoyed it, and it was the happiest he had felt in years. Louis felt a bit selfish for wanting at least one sliver of that happiness back. So, he needed Harry’s response for that happiness, because the only place he knew he could find that happiness was from Harry himself.

                It was a few days later that Louis finally received something. It was dark and cloudy outside, definitely cold. The rain was pouring down, but Louis was sitting outside of the front porch, the sound of the loud rain shower washing away all his thoughts he had floating throughout his mind. The sound of a car nearing by interrupted his silence and he watched a car pull up to the front of the house. A female stepped out and ran up to the covered porch. Once she was near, Louis was able to recognize who she was. Louis stood up to go greet her. “Hey, Gem,” he said softly.

                Gemma smiled a bit to Louis and just reached into her trench coat pocket and pulled out an envelope. She took the dry part of the jacket she was wearing and wiped off the envelope before looking back up to Louis and smiling. “Harry sent this,” she said as she handed it over to him. “He’s back in London, performing in the downtown streets. He sent it with another letter to me; he didn’t know where to send this one to you. He wasn’t sure if you moved away after your dad passed.”

                Louis took the damp envelope and held onto it with dear life. “Thanks,” he replied, smiling back to Gemma.

                Gemma nodded. “How’s your mum doing?” she asked.

                “She’s fine,” Louis replied, shrugging a bit.

                “Is she?” Gemma asked back, and Louis just nodded as a reply. “That’s good,” Gemma said back.

                Louis sighed. Here was this small talk he hated again. He loved Gemma right now for giving him this letter, but he wanted her to go away. He wanted to read this letter now. He wanted to get his little bit of happiness from Harry. “Thank you,” Louis said again. Gemma gave him one simple nod before heading back to her car and leaving.

                Louis took a few moments to himself, just breathing deeply, before he sat back down on the patio chair and opened the envelope. He looked over the handwriting, admiring Harry’s neatness. He wasn’t even reading the words yet. All he could focus on was how it looked like Harry tried so hard on every letter he wrote to make it look nice. Louis smiled from that. It was so Harry; that was the only way to describe it. Trying so hard, trying to impress, giving everything he got, pouring out all of his love. It was the only thing Harry knew how to do, and Louis found himself loving it even more. He took a breath as he finally began to read the words.

                                              _Dear Louis,_

_Those two words, “Dear Louis” take me away to another time, when we used to write to each other after my mum and dad died. I used to tell you about my new friends and my new life, and you used to tell me about the grand time my mum and dad were having in Heaven. The truth is nothing. What you believed to be true is everything. And the main thing that I used to believe is that I would be with you forever. Forever. The reason it has taken me so long to write you is that I have been a fool. I’ve spent my life fooling myself. Every letter I have ever written to you has been a love letter. How could they have been anything else? I can see now that all of them—except this one—were bad love letters. Bad love letters beg for love back. Good love letters ask for nothing. This, I’m pleased to announce, is my first good love letter to you, because there is nothing more for you to do. You’ve already done everything. I have enough of you in my head to last forever. So, please don’t ever worry about me. I’m peachy. I really am. I have everything. If I had one wish, it would be that your life brings you a taste of the happiness that you’ve brought me, that you can feel what it’s like to love._

_Your friend forever,_

_Harry_

                Louis probably reread the letter about a dozen times before he finally sat down the piece of paper. Harry’s words hit straight to his heart and made it feel like it swelled up and was about to burst with love. He understood now that Harry’s motives, although a little creepy, were really sweet deep down. Harry was just a lost soul looking for someone to love him back, specifically Louis, but Louis ignored, neglected, and rejected him. It made him feel like an asshole to be honest, but he was sure the way he reacted to finding out that Harry had been following him was very logical too. He was stuck in a situation. Here Harry was saying his final goodbye. He had finally been able to move on and leave Louis alone, to give him his peace and quiet. Louis could take this because this is what he had wanted in the first place. But now, he was having doubts. It seemed that his heart was thinking differently than his brain was. He wanted Harry around. Louis had lost too many things recently, and he couldn’t afford to let a grand opportunity slip through his fingers. He had learned that life was really too short, so why waste time worrying about what if? Why not just go for it.

                So that was what Louis decided to do. He headed inside and talked to his mother to explain what he was doing before packing up his things and leaving out the door right there. He took a cab to the train station and bought the first ticket to London that was available. When he finally reached the great city, he headed downtown to search around for Harry. He looked almost everywhere he could think of where street performers normally gathered and tried to get their small paycheck. He unfortunately came up empty handed and left to go sulk the night away in his hotel room. The next morning, Louis didn’t hesitate to get back out on the streets in the downtown area of London, even taking the time to ask around to see if anyone had seen Harry. He came up empty handed once again.

                After a few more days of searching and coming up with no results, Louis was beginning to give up hope on finding Harry. There was a possibility that he had moved on to some other better place and no one knew where he was anymore. This morning he didn’t wake up so bright early to search. He didn’t get up out of bed for a while. He didn’t find a point in it, but eventually he did gather up enough energy to get dressed and head back out for the day. Today must have been his lucky day though. As he was heading down a street, two men stood against a building. They were dirty and disheveled and wore really tattered clothes. Louis gave them a friendly smile and a nod as he walked passed them, but before he could get too far, one of the men asked, “Vacation?”

                Louis stopped walking and turned around to face the two men. “Am I on a vacation?” he asked for a clarification. The man just gave a nod back. Louis figured he must’ve looked like a lost tourist looking around, but he was really just searching out for Harry. “No, I’m looking for a friend.” He paused before deciding why not give it a shot. “He juggles,” he said to give them a description of Harry. The two men looked at him dumb-founded. “You know, like balls. He juggles balls.” When he still got no response, he quickly added in, “He wears pajamas.”

                This seemed to spark recognition in the men’s faces. One of the men laughed while the other one nodded and asked, “White boy in pajamas with crazy hair?”

                Louis felt a breath of air leave his body in a _woosh_ as relief washed over him. He smiled and nodded reverently. “Yes, yes that’s him. Where did you see him?”

                “He goes down there, around the market place,” the man answered, pointing down the street. “He doesn’t come ‘til about dark though.”

                “Thank you, thank you!” Louis quickly said back. “Thank you so much.” He gave both of the men a hug, not even caring about how dirty and grimy they were before he rushed down to the market place. He didn’t even care about being super early. He was just excited, but to take his mind off of things and to help pass time, he looked around the shops. Soon enough, the sun set and it became night time. Louis felt like his nerves were shot, his body buzzing in excitement. In the market place, there was a big open square in the middle, and Louis could guess that’s where Harry would be. He slowly made his way out to the square. As he approached it, there was a good sized crowd of people all staring in the same direction, watching something. Louis carefully headed down the stairs and looked around. There were street performers everywhere. People of all different types were doing different things. There were flag twirlers and magicians and artists and musicians, just a whole variety of people. He headed down in the crowd and began to look around. He heard a smaller portion of the crowd start to clap, so he quickly hurried over there. Once he pushed through the taller people to get to the front, he felt like he was seeing a lie. There Harry was in the middle of a circle of people juggling with his usual tennis balls he used. Louis just stood there, knowing he was going unnoticed because of how concentrated Harry was, but he didn’t care. He crossed his arms over his chest to help keep some warmth from the cold air as he watched with a big grin. All he could picture was the little boy he had grown up with and known, sitting there juggling and laughing happily like he knew him to be.

                Suddenly the balls just dropped to the floor and Louis came out of his trance to see that Harry was staring straight at him in surprise. Louis gave him a proud smile which caused Harry to smile back with his infection grin. Louis gave Harry a nod of approval and that was all that was needed for Harry. It was a switch clicked on and Harry just needed to impress Louis. Harry reached down and grabbed a small wooden stick that had two torches on each end and he grabbed two more sticks that were plain. He used the two plain sticks to toss around and twist the torched stick. After doing a few neat tricks and earning eager cheering from the crowd, he stopped to light the two torches on the end of the stick before starting up what he was doing before, this time tossing around the burning stick. He spun it around and tossed it a few times before moving onto some more dangerous stunts with it, weaving the burning stick in and out of his legs and tossing it over his head and catching it behind his back. Eventually he caught the middle of the stick with his hand and blew out the two fires on each end. The crowd started to cheer and clap loudly. Harry looked up from the ground and stared breathlessly at Louis who then started to clap and smile widely. Harry smiled his dimpled grin back and took off his hat, sitting it on the ground so people could come give him tips. He left it alone and immediately hurried over to Louis. As he walked over to him, all Harry could see was Louis as a little boy, clapping and smiling proudly as he used to do whenever he watched Harry juggle.

                “Harry, that was so—“ Louis started but stopped when he felt a pair of lips of his own. It took him a second to realize that it was Harry kissing him, and he just closed his eyes and felt. He felt how soft and gentle Harry’s lips were. He felt how soft his touch was. He felt his heart hammering wildly in his chest. He felt his mind melting away as it felt like he became one with Harry.

                All too quickly the kiss ended though. Instead of Harry pulling back, he dragged his lips across Louis’ cheek to his ear and whispered, “Are you following me?”

                Louis couldn’t help but erupt into a fit of giggles and he kissed Harry’s cheek before pulling back. “Maybe,” he cheekily said back with a smirk as he looked up into his favorite green eyes he never knew he missed so much.

                Harry chuckled a bit and took in a deep breath as he looked down at Louis. He just couldn’t believe this. He finally had his boy back. “I’ve been waiting for forever for you to notice me,” he said.

                Louis laughed some more and reached down, taking Harry’s large hands in his own small ones. He intertwined their fingers together and pulled him close before looking up and giving him a soft kiss. “Now you’ll have to fight me off forever because there is no way I’m ever letting you slip away from me again.”


End file.
